Chương 93: A Friendly Voidling Meets An Unborn Hero (Non-canonical!)

"Look, I know you're nervous, Dad, but there really are no more demons," patiently repeated Hugh, who was holding the reins of a horse, and was dressed in the garb of a young merchant.

"And even if we get attacked by bandits, well..." He tilted his head sharply, causing his bright blue pony tail to flick around. It proceeded to smack him in the face.

"Ouch," he commented, not particularly pleased about his impromptu lesson on momentum. Unlike the dye, growing his hair out hadn't been strictly necessary, but he'd done it anyway; research had long since confirmed the benefits offered by getting into the spirit of the thing. For similar reasons, his nails were painted with blue glitter.

"I never thought my own son would get caught up in the whole 'magical girl' fad," sighed the father, George.

"And despite what you think, I'm not scared of travelling."

"You haven't been on any sort of outing since before I was born!"

"Of course I have! I visited your grandmother last week."

"You took the teleporter. It doesn't count. Don't you ever miss the open road? The soothing trot of the horses and gentle rocking of the cart?"

"... Gentle? Let me tell you, boy, when I was a travelling merchant, I was not well off enough to afford enchanted suspension."

"Then be glad you can enjoy it now." The former travelling merchant sighed. He'd sworn off running merchant caravans of his own ever since his had been lost in a demon attack, despite making a fortune on the commodities market in the aftermath. Still, Hugh wasn't wrong. There were no demons or monsters around these days, and only very few bandits. What bandits there were would run away at the first sight of anyone with neon hair, just in case they were one of them.

If they saw the glittery nails, they probably wouldn't even bother running; they'd just knock themselves out instead, to reduce the pain and humiliation that would otherwise feature in their immediate future. As a result, the roads were safe. The weather was warm, the cart was comfortable and, overall, it was a pleasant day out with his son. It wouldn't hurt to...

"Argggg!" screamed Hugh as his horse reared. An eventful few seconds followed, in which the cart was brought to a sudden and unplanned halt.

"Is that my leg?" asked someone, although in the tangle of limbs, it wasn't obvious who.

"Maybe? I don't think it's one of mine. I think that's my blood, though. Would you happen to know which way is up?"

"How many times do I need to tell you?" complained a third voice, heretofore unheard aboard the cart.

"You need to look before you teleport!"

"I did!" objected a fourth voice.

"I followed your instructions exactly! I checked the laws of physics were compatible, then checked the air was breathable and a sensible temperature and pressure, then brought us out into an open space!"

"That is... technically true, and I'll admit this was a better attempt than that time you brought us out into solid rock. The problem is that the space was about to become not open."

"I was about to ask about that, actually. This is a cart, right? One of the things low-tech people use to move stuff around when they aren't good with pockets? But if the laws of physics are the same here, why are the wheels up in the air instead of on the ground? Surely that's massively inefficient."

"The wheels are supposed to be on the ground, actually," replied Hugh.

"Also, what is happening right now, and does anyone happen to be a healer? I'm feeling a little strange, and I don't think my wrist should be this colour."

"Ooo, there's someone under there? We found a new friend already!"

"I think that's rather unlikely, given what you just did to him. Now, let's try this again from the beginning. Take us back, rewind time a couple of minutes, then bring us here a few metres in that direction."

"Look, I know you're nervous, Dad, but there really are no more demons," patiently repeated Hugh, who was holding the reins of a horse, and was dressed in the garb of a young merchant.

"And even if we get attacked... by..." The voice stuttered to a confused halt.

"I just had the weirdest sense of deja-vu."

"You aren't the only one, lad," replied George, frowning.

"I could have sworn we just had this conversation." Hugh brought his horse to a controlled halt, this time managing to keep the cart the correct way up throughout the entire process. Just as it stopped, there was an odd popping noise and a trio of girls appeared by the side of the road. Hugh and George both peered at them with an intense suspicion.

"Oh, you were right! It really was that way up," said the middle one.

"Now that you aren't dying of blood loss, would you like to be my friend?"

"... Dunno about friend, but I'd like to be your lace supplier," murmured George, looking at the girl's incredible dress and estimating the weight of fabric it contained.

"It must be magic, not real, else the weight would crush her," pointed out Hugh.

"Anyway, what in the world just happened? I feel like I just missed something very important."

"Best not to ask," said the left-hand girl, who certainly hadn't given any profit to fabric sellers anywhere, even if her costume was real.

"Just smile and nod, wait for the chance to ask Anya to do her diamond trick, fill up your pockets, then sidle away to the bank when her back is turned."

"Assuming diamonds are actually valuable here," pointed out the third girl, who was in immaculate black-and-white maid attire. Too immaculate. It was obviously designed to look like a stereotypical maid's uniform, rather than for anyone to actually work in.

"You're also assuming that they've invented banks." She also had the telltale feline ears and tail that identified her as one of its victims. In fact, the paws suggested that it had taken things a step further than normal, and were further evidence that she couldn't possibly be a real maid. Most maid work required opposable thumbs.

"You lot are trying far too hard," said Hugh, taking pity on them.

"You, the one on the left."

"My name's Jill," said Jill.

"And mine's Hugh. Anyway, don't you know that it's been almost two decades since research proved that skimpy costumes provide no additional benefit? Even if people don't get quite as upset at ankles as they used to a generation ago, you're showing far more than ankles. You'll get arrested for indecency if you use that in a city. You should really change your design to give yourself some more coverage. And you in the middle..."

"Anya," said Anya.

"... I can't believe I'm going to say this, but isn't that... impractical? I know 'practicality' is generally considered a naughty word when discussing costume designs, but even so, there are limits. Surely you still need to fit through doorways and suchlike? You could keep the black lace and general design, but cut one or two of the skirts? Or maybe a dozen of them? And lastly, you on the right..."

"Keri," said Keri.

"... Uh... well... my condolences, I guess. The costume itself is fine, though." Keri tilted her head in confusion.

"Okay, question!" said Jill, holding up her hand as if the open road was a classroom.

"Yes?"

"What the heck are you talking about?" Hugh blinked.

"Your magical girl costumes?"

"Our what now?"

"Your costumes! Which one of you has the teleport power, by the way? That was amazing! Teleporting without a receiver at the endpoint has been one of the more stubborn frontiers of magic, and I've never heard of anyone managing it before. What's the range? Does it work without reagents? If so, the logistical uses would be endless! You'd completely overturn the economics of the continent overnight!"

"Hugh?" whispered George.

"Yes?"

"You're getting too excited, lad." Hugh blinked again.

"Right." This time, it was Anya who raised her hand.

"Yes?"

"I realise this is the opposite way around to how our visits usually go, but... uh... what's going on right now?" Keri took her turn at raising a paw, although in her case it was directed at Anya.

"At a guess, this world possesses magic, but it isn't capable of unrestricted personal teleportation, thus your abilities have been mistaken as an important magical breakthrough. Furthermore, our clothing is sufficiently far from the local norms that it's being mistaken for some sort of fancy dress." In response, it was Hugh who raised his hand.

"I have no idea what this gesture means, but apparently we do it to speak now? Anyway, may I ask what you mean by 'this world'? You make it sound like you're not from here, but we've already had our summoned hero for the latest cycle, and there was a world announcement about it being the final cycle."

"Summoned hero?" asked Jill.

"Cycle?" asked Keri.

"World announcement?" asked Anya.

"You know, this would be a lot easier if you let me read their brains."

"We've already been over that," sighed Jill.

"Reading people's minds without permission is impolite. Sticking tentacles up people's noses is also impolite. Reading their minds by means of sticking tentacles up their noses is therefore doubly impolite."

"I think, perhaps, we should get a move on," whispered George urgently to Hugh.

"... Despite my earlier reassurances about the safety of the roads, I think I agree," whispered back Hugh, grasping the reins.

"How about I read their minds, then turn back time again? We get to know everything, but at no point on the timeline of this universe do I read their minds or stick tentacles up their noses."

"No, that's not how it works. You still possess knowledge that was obtained impolitely. Just because they don't remember it doesn't absolve you of anything."

"But it's not just that they don't remember it, or someone could argue that murder wasn't important if no-one ever found out who did it. It would literally never have happened."

"It would in your timeline," answered back Jill, adding, "yes Keri?" when Keri once again raised a paw.

"This isn't related to your interesting philosophical debate, but I feel I should point out that our new friends have left already." Jill peered down the road at the rapidly retreating cloud of dust and sighed.

"Look, I know you're nervous, Dad, but there really are no more demons," patiently repeated Hugh, who was holding the reins of a horse, and was dressed in the garb of a young merchant.

"And even... if..." The voice stuttered to a confused halt.

"I just had the weirdest sensation of abject terror," said Hugh.

"Me too, lad. Felt like someone was walking over my grave, and I'm pretty darn sure I'm not dead yet." Hugh flicked his reins and the horse accelerated. The landscape sped up in response. Briefly. This story has been unlawfully obtained without the author's consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.

"Uh... It may have been a while since I was on the road, but I'm pretty sure this isn't how roads are supposed to work," commented George, eyeing up the way the packed dirt was rolling past beneath them, and yet the surrounding landscape wasn't moving at all. And then he spotted the trio of girls, two of whom were sitting cross-legged on the floor, for some reason each holding an index finger against their lips.

The third—one of its mascot hybrids, in a magical girl costume based on a maid's uniform—stepped forwards and opened a paw.

"Excuse me," she said politely, but the attention of the merchants was still focused on the paw. Or rather, on the diamonds it contained. George leaked a thin strand of drool.

"Ah, good, so they are valuable here." The paw closed, hiding the diamonds from view. Hugh—deciding that the owner of that many diamonds couldn't be that bad—brought his horse to a gentle stop. Not that it seemed to make any difference; they hadn't been getting anywhere anyway.

"We're travellers from a distant land, lost and confused and in need of some basic information," continued the eccentric rich girl.

"Please be assured we can pay you well for your time." The pair of merchants audibly swallowed, but as Jill herself had once commented, someone would tolerate quite a lot of weirdness for a single diamond. For an entire paw-full, most people could even tolerate Anya." Another demon lord? Really?" sighed Jill some time later as the trio walked along the road towards what was apparently the capital city of the local kingdom.

"Why is it that every other world we visit seems to be under threat by some ridiculous, nonsensical malign being?"

"At least this one has apparently been defeated already," commented Keri.

"By a foetus, nonetheless. I'll admit, that part is novel. I think this is the first time we've ever visited a world where a foetus has been a vital participant in world events."

"What about the pyramid-shaped world that was being pulled through space by a giant squid?" asked Anya.

"They certainly got rather worked up when one of the king's maids inexplicably fell pregnant."

"A vital and active participant," said Jill, correcting herself. The group continued walking in silence for a few seconds, before all three members spoke up at the same time.

"... Is it bad that I kinda want to try out this magical girl thing?" asked Jill.

"I want to meet this 'mascot lord'. The whole hybrid thing sounds fun," said Keri.

"We should pay Mystery a visit. She knows how to unlock the magical powers of friendship!" exclaimed Anya. There was another moment of silence.

"So... we find Mystery, teleport her to the mascot lord, then have a magical girl dress-up party together?" suggested Jill.

"We should probably do it the other way around, given that Mystery still hasn't been born," said Keri.

"Anya has never been great with non-Euclidean plumbing, so trying to bring Mystery with us could get messy. Let's bring the mascot lord to her instead."

"Fair enough," agreed Jill.

"Anya? Can you arrange this road to run through the middle of the enchanted forest on the way to the capital?"

"Of course," agreed Anya, effortlessly making some rather complex changes to the fundamental laws of geometry. Sure enough, a minute later, trees started popping up on either side of the road. Another minute and they were in the middle of dense forest. A minute more, and the road emerged into a clearing.

"Visitors!" came an immediate declaration.

"More friends! Yay!" The group looked at the speaker; a purple, flying cat-like animal, zipping through the air on sparkling wings.

"Oh! So cute!" exclaimed Keri.

"Hehe," giggled the mascot, preening at the praise.

"You want to be my friend?!" exclaimed Anya.

"Of course! I want to be everyone's friend!" Anya's eyes sparkled dangerously.

"Huh? Was there always a road here?" asked another voice, this one belonging to the leader of another trio of girls, with fluffy ears and tails of red, yellow and blue. More of the mascots circled them.

"Yeah, of course," said another of the girls.

"Look at it. You don't get potholes like that overnight. Must have been here for years."

"Yes, but I'm pretty sure it hadn't been here for years an hour ago, when I was over here picking flowers."

"Putting that aside, don't you think these poor girls need help? I mean, look at them. No coordination at all. How can they travel together as a magical girl party without a single unifying feature between their costumes?" Jill once more stuck up a hand.

"Yes?" said one of the girls.

"Do you think you can slow down a bit? Maybe start with some introductions? I'm Jill, and it's nice to meet you."

"Oh, of course! Introductions! We can do that!"

"Right!" agreed the other two girls. The three bounced into a triangle formation, each raising their hands into the air. And then they did that. There was dancing. There was glitter. There was a short poem about friendship's triumph over evil. There was a complete and utter lack of embarrassment. Given that all three had picked up the [CGI] sub-skill for [Magical Girl Transformation], there even appeared to be lasers.

"In the name of Mystery, we will spread the magic of friendship across the entire world!" exclaimed the three girls in perfect synchronisation. Jill and Keri stared slack-jawed, but Anya was listening to the mascot's lecture on love and friendship with such rapt attention that she'd missed the entire display. She'd even pulled out a notebook from somewhere, and was taking notes.

The mascot, enthused to find someone actually listening without running away, was spilling words at a hundred miles an hour and had no intention of stopping. It was also discovering that talking about love and friendship for any length of time was actually quite difficult, and so had moved on to a spiel about the wonders of vanilla milkshake. Anya didn't seem to have noticed.

"Okay," said Jill, rebooting.

"So... that just happened."

"Yes. Yes it did," agreed Keri.

"We definitely need to have a go."

"Yes. Yes we do," agreed Keri.

"But I think we need to get Anya back first." Jill waved a hand in front of Anya's face. Anya gave no indication that she'd noticed.

"I... don't think this has ever happened before," commented Magical Girl Ruby Red, glancing around at the flock of mascots, numbering in the dozens. None were flying. Some were groaning. Others were snoring. A few were just about clinging to consciousness, but had a deep, hollow look in their eyes that suggested they'd rather not be. One truly heroic mascot was still going.

"And... and that is why... for the sake of love and friendship... hats should not be orange," it finished. And then it fell over, joining its compatriots in unconscious bliss. Anya carefully added the last fullstop to her notebook, then snapped it closed. Far more pages rifled past than the space should have permitted, but the lecture had been quite extensive, so she'd repeatedly found herself needing to add more.

"That was very interesting," she said.

"I learnt a lot today."

"Today?" asked Jill incredulously, looking up at the starry sky.

"Huh? Is it night already?"

"It's next week already!"

"Oh."

"Don't just 'oh' at me! You have been torturing those poor creatures for days! Look what you did to them!"

"Torturing? They wanted to talk!"

"Yes, and I want to eat chocolate, but that doesn't mean I should eat chocolate non-stop for twenty-four hours a day, days on end. The way you just stood there, with your notebook, listening. They couldn't help themselves. You're like fly paper to them! And I'm fairly sure that everything after the first few minutes was complete codswallop anyway."

"Sorry."

"I think it's them you need to apologise to."

"They're kinda designed with the assumption that people will run away," explained Magical Girl Topaz Yellow.

"Next time, you should listen for a bit, maybe five to ten minutes, and then run off."

"That might be hard, but I'll try to remember," said Anya.

"By the way, who are you? Are you new friends?"

"Shall we do that again?" asked Magical Girl Sapphire Blue.

"No thanks. Somehow, this sight is sapping all of my enthusiasm," said Ruby Red.

"I'm Ruby Red."

"Then I'm Sapphire Blue."

"And I'm Topaz Yellow."

"And together, we're the mascot containment force."

"At least for the next few weeks, then our shift is over. Wonder if they'll stay knocked out until then?"

"They're funny names," said Anya.

"It can't just be local tradition, because that cart guy had a normal name."

"They aren't their real names," pointed out Jill.

"It's their magical girl names."

"Our real names are boring," pouted Ruby Red.

"Fair enough. My real name isn't Anya either, but it's not boring. It's... mmmph!"

"I know you're a little buzzed right now," said Jill, her hand firmly clamped over Anya's mouth, "but please remember the effect your real name has on us mortals."

"Mmmph!" agreed Anya.

"Anyway, now that you're back with us, we should pick up Keri and get out of this forest. It's as much of a trap to you as you are to those poor creatures."

"Where is Keri, anyway?" asked Anya.

"Well... you know how you got on so well with the magical cats?"

"Yes?"

"Let's just say that the ex-demon lord has probably lost his enthusiasm for humans with fluffy cat ears by now."

"This road really is convenient," said the ex-demon lord, who had in fact not lost any enthusiasm whatsoever.

"A city of a hundred thousand, only a few minutes' walk away! After getting all those ideas from Keri, I have a hundred new things I need to try! They built a teleporter in the village, but they won't let me use it."

"There's a good reason for that..." muttered Magical Girl Topaz Yellow.

"Yes, apparently I have too much mana for it to work," replied the ex-demon lord, who, despite its great hearing, completely failed to pick up on the sarcasm.

"... This is a complete failure of our mission," sighed Magical Girl Ruby Red.

"Would you like to try stopping them with force?" asked Magical Girl Sapphire Blue.

"Please let me know if you're considering it, so that I can run away to the next continent beforehand."

"Are we doing something wrong?" asked Anya.

"No, not at all," answered Topaz Yellow sarcastically.

"Phew. We're not from around here, so you'll have to let us know if we are," replied Anya, equally deaf to the sarcasm. Alas, a big part of the duties of the mascot containment force was to prevent the mascots and their master realising there was a mascot containment force, which heavily limited their options when an outsider turned up, built a road that linked the centre of the enchanted forest directly to a large city and then invited the ex-demon lord on a road trip.

They couldn't just say it wasn't allowed to go, so they'd decided to come along instead in the hopes of containing the damage. At least they had the reassurance that if they failed to contain the damage, the result was likely to be highly entertaining and overwhelmingly fluffy.

"Perhaps we should stop and work on our team magical girl transformation for a bit?" suggested Jill, who had picked up on the sarcasm. She was having flashbacks to the effects of introducing Anya to Glimmerhome, and was worried they were about to cause a repeat.

"Don't you want to show off a perfect transformation for Mystery?"

"Nah, I think we should ask Mystery to help out with our choreography," said Keri, who had also picked up on the sarcasm, and simply didn't care. To her, improving humans on other planets by adding extra fluff was a laudable goal, not any sort of undesirable cultural contamination.

"We can help with that," pointed out Ruby Red desperately.

"In fact, I suspect everyone in the village would chip in."

"But that's not the same thing as having the progenitor of all magical girls help," pointed out Keri.

"Keri?" asked Jill.

"Yes?"

"No, never mind. What's the worst that can happen?" Kellela sat in the garden of her mansion, sipping tea with a very carefully constructed smile plastered onto her face. Hayedalf sat next to her, wearing much the same expression. Beneath the table, they held hands tightly. Part of that was due to the ex-demon lord sitting opposite them. But only a small part. Another part was the plumes of smoke visible around the garden, but again, that was only a minor issue, in the grand scheme of things.

The bigger part was the girl in black. She may have been wrapped up in enough fabric to put even Rose's wedding dress to shame, but both Kellela and Hayedalf possessed skills such as [Soul's Eye] and [Telepathy], and mere fabric was no barrier to their sight. They didn't quite know what they were looking at, but they knew it was human-shaped purely by choice. They also knew that they'd quite like it to remain human shaped.

"Hmm... A courtesan, a merchant and an eldritch Creature beyond the ken of men," pondered Mystery, tapping the table with a purple paw as she thought. She also had [Soul's Eye], but unlike her parents, didn't much care. It wasn't as if she could claim to be normal herself.

"This is certainly an interesting challenge. I've never tried to create a design for a line-up like that before."" Please don't do anything to get more achievements," hissed the very visibly pregnant Kellela between clenched teeth.

"Oh, come on, Mum. I'm not going to get a legendary achievement just for designing magical girl costumes," complained Mystery.

"And choreography," added Jill.

"We need our own dance."

"And theme song!" added Anya. Jill and Keri looked at her.

"What? I like singing."

"A theme song I can do. The biggest problem is some unifying factor between the three of you. Some link that tells the world you're a group, and not just three girls who happen to be in the same place at the same time." The thoughtful silence was broken by a scream as another neighbour happened to catch a glimpse of themselves in a mirror. A few new plumes of smoke had joined their brethren in the sky, too, although what had caused them wasn't obvious.

It wasn't like the ex-demon lord had set things on fire as they walked through the city. Merely changed a few things to make the city cuter. Streaks of red, yellow and blue flashed across the sky as the unfortunate mascot containment squad did their best to contain the damage.

"... While you're thinking, I need to have words with this giant oaf about consent," said Keri, who, despite her love of fluffy body-mods, did at least have Views on asking people for permission first.

"Tentacles!" exclaimed the oaf in question, desperately trying to avoid being lectured. Everyone turned to look at him.

"They're unifying, aren't they? Eldrich means 'covered in tentacles'..."

"I'm pretty sure it doesn't," said a confused-sounding Anya.

"... and courtesans are basically professional tentacle wielders..."

"The only time I'd seen a tentacle prior to meeting Anya was when a rich client fed me some squid," pointed out Jill.

"... and merchants... uh..."

"Yes?" asked Keri, smiling in a way that suggested the ex-demon lord had better watch its next words very closely.

"Well, she's not really a merchant anymore, is she? More of a... uh... professional biomancy subject? And what professional biomancy subject doesn't want tentacles?"

"... I suppose that's no more of a stretch than the logic you used for the other two," Keri admitted with a nod, not objecting to her label at all.

"Hmm... Actually, maybe I can work with that," said Mystery, still pondering.

"It sounds stupid, and generally magical girls are supposed to fight things with tentacles, not have tentacles themselves, but... somehow it fits. What if we make Anya the leader, in a sort of ballgown except that we have the base of her skirt unravel into tentacles. Then Jill and Keri can have them coming out of their backs. Or little backpacks on their backs, maybe? Not too many; maybe four each? Two on each side, to keep it symmetrical. That should look good and not be too hard to control.

What would their names be, though? Anya is definitely Void Black. If we lean into the merchant thing, Keri could be coloured gold, which I guess makes Jill pink, but what names would they use?

'Void' doesn't easily lend itself to a series. Maybe if we use void in the space sense, we could have Celestial Gold and... Should we go for opposites? Infernal Pink? Demonic Pink?"

"... No," said Jill flatly.

"Are you sure? I can see the costume already... It would need to be a bit more skimpy than usual, maybe with a few spikes. I don't think it would work if there was more than three of you, but the angel, the devil and the eldritch would be a great theme. Yes, an angel with tentacles is a little bit of an odd concept, but not that odd. No odder than the way they always seem to have a gazillion wings all covered in eyes." Jill hesitated.

"... Okay, that does sound cool, but only if Keri gets the wings full of eyes."

"Great, let's try it out! Then, once we've got the costumes down, we can work on inventing a transformation sequence."

"Yay! I finally get to feel the magical powers of friendship first hand!" exclaimed Anya. Mystery cast her spell, focusing her considerable magical power on the Creature of the Void. The spell slammed into her with all the effect of a moth flying into a brick wall.

"Hmm..." said Mystery.

"Maybe it doesn't work if you're not attached to the world's system?"

"Nah, I felt it. It's just that the magic of this world seems a bit weak," said Anya, which wasn't exactly fair.

"Let's see if I can boost it a bit." Anya boosted it a bit. ding Mystery the Human has obtained the legendary achievement [Void Touched] at the age of 0. Mystery the Human has obtained the mythical achievement [Interdimensional Spell Forger] at the age of 0. Kellela's fake smile broke for a moment as she did her best not to cry.