Chương 24: Grocery Run

In the first four days of winter vacation, Leander had done nothing productive. Well, if you asked him, rotting away in his bedroom, watching anime, reading manga, and gaming without a care in the world was extremely productive. He was in heaven. His heaven. His bed had become a shrine of junk food wrappers, cookie crumbs, and empty cups of instant ramen noodles. This, as far as he was concerned, was the best life had to offer. Well… maybe having a girlfriend would be a nice addition.

Then again, that was something the world gave to people who had their life together, and he knew well he was far from one of those, so for now, this was damn near perfection. He glanced at his journal on the nightstand, the one he'd been scribbling in between anime episodes. He rolled off the bed, and when his ancient laptop landed screen-first on the wooden floor, he didn't even look at it. The thing was so thick it could've survived a two-story drop.

"Ocean eyes… a laugh that stops time," he read what was written in the journal, cringing after he picked it up. He scratched his head.

"God, that's awful." He tore the page from the notebook, folded it, and slipped it into his pocket. Evidence to be destroyed later. He told himself that every time. Knock knock.

"Leander!" Rosie bellowed from behind the door.

"Come on, get out of your room!" Leander's eyes widened, but he didn't say anything. If he stayed quiet, maybe she'd go away.

"Do you even know how long it's been? Four days!" Rosie's fist slammed against the door.

"You only come out to grab more snacks. Have you even showered?"

"That's not true…" Leander muttered.

"I also come out when I need to use the toilet… sometimes."

"You better open this goddamn door before I break it down!"

"But—""Now!" she roared.

"Okay! Okay!" Leander sucked in a sharp breath and jolted out of bed.

"I'm opening it! No need to break any doors." He'd planned to ignore every distraction during break. But Rosie? Yeah, he couldn't ignore her. She could be kind of insane at times, especially when she sounded that pissed. He shivered as he remembered the time she almost ripped his ear off when she learned he'd spent his whole stipend allowance, which he'd been saving for a year, on manga instead of saving it for college. He'd always told her he wouldn't go to one. It was such a waste of money.

When he finally opened the door, Rosie stood with her arms crossed, brows furrowed, and lips pressed thin, wearing a look that clearly said: You've done absolutely nothing productive, have you? Before he could say anything, she blurted, "Oh my god, you stink." She took a step back, her face twisting in disgust.

"What? No, I don't," Leander said, genuinely confused. He lifted his arm, sniffed, and immediately flinched, his nose wrinkling into itself. Well… that's embarrassing.

"Fine, maybe I do smell a little," he muttered after clearing his throat.

"Didn't think it was that bad, though."

"What did you expect? You haven't showered in four days," Rosie said, feigning a gag with her tongue out.

"You're basically a walking dumpster."

"I'll shower later."

"No. Do it now," she ordered, still pinching her nose.

"We have to go out and buy groceries and stuff for tonight."

"Tonight? What are we doing tonight?" he asked, scratching his head. Were they celebrating something? Nothing came to mind.

"Unbelievable." Rosie rolled her eyes.

"Of course you forgot. See? That's exactly why you need to get out of your man cave and socialize more often. You wouldn't keep forgetting important dates." Leander didn't argue because he knew she had a point. He did disappear into his room more than was probably healthy. It wasn't that he hated people. He liked them just fine, in small doses: Rosie, Marie, and a few of the younger kids at the orphanage. But his room… it felt so safe and so personal.

"It's Christmas Eve," Rosie said.

"Remember the party? The one we've been planning for two weeks?" Leander blinked. Right. Christmas party.

"I remembered," he said.

"You absolutely did not."

"You know how time flies when you're not doing anything productive." She stared at him for a long moment.

"I'll be waiting for you downstairs. You have twenty minutes," she said, already walking off.

"One minute more and I'm coming back with a hose." Leander sighed.

"Guess I've got no choice." Twenty minutes later, he rushed downstairs, his hair still dripping water, but he was clean and, most importantly, no longer smelling like a decaying onion. He left his room a disaster, but he'd deal with that later. Rosie stood at the front door, her coat buttoned, with a beige scarf tied carefully around her neck. She looked back and gave him a sideways smile.

"Well, look who finally came out. See? Soap isn't that bad to use every day," she said, smirking.

"Is it now?" he replied, running a hand through his damp hair to style it.

"I think I scrubbed half my skin off."

"Good, that means you're clean. Now come on, I don't want to spend all night shopping." Christmas lights flickered from rusted fire escapes alongside the old buildings as they walked the snowy sidewalks. Steam rose from sewer grates and vanished into the cold winter air. The city streets were packed with kids hurling snowballs at each other. Couples held hands, and families rushed through last-minute errands. Everyone seemed to know exactly where they were going and who'd be waiting when they got there.

Leander glanced over at Rosie. Her breath misted in the cold, and she was watching a little girl drag her father toward a store window, pointing frantically at a bright toy inside. There was something in Rosie's expression he couldn't quite read.

"Hey," he whispered.

"You good?"

"Huh?" She raised a brow, then nodded.

"I'm fine, just noticing how happy people seem around Christmas." Leander considered.

"Makes you wonder what it would be like to have a normal Christmas, right? I do." Rosie turned to him, confused.

"A normal Christmas?"

"You know… a big tree in the middle of the living room, expensive presents under it, hot chocolate, a fireplace." He paused, taking a deep breath.

"Parents…" he made air quotes around the word.

"You know, normal." She puckered her lips as if in contemplation.

"I think… our version of Christmas is fine. The kids are happy. Marie cooks for us like we're royalty, and you get to sit your butt down afterward and eat junk food all night. We make do with what we have." Leander smiled faintly.

"I guess you're right. When you put it that way… it sounds like more than most people have." The grocery store was about a ten-minute walk. The store felt like a cramped box with so many last-minute shoppers grabbing whatever they could before closing time. Fluorescent lights flickered overhead, and the smell of tomato sauce hung heavy over a display that someone had knocked and no one had bothered to clean up.

Up in a corner, a single static speaker crackled with a decidedly un-Christmas-like song:"Cause I want it now, I want it now, give me your heart and your soul…" Leander caught himself humming along as he grabbed a cart and started pushing it, while Rosie scanned the shelves with the intensity of someone defusing a bomb. They wove through the aisles and past people. Rosie grabbed items left and right, always opting for the cheaper off-brand option.

Leander tossed a bag of marshmallows into the cart, and Rosie glared at him.

"Those aren't on the list."

"Yes, but they're festive and tasty."

"They're four dollars." He kept the marshmallows in the cart anyway. She rolled her eyes but didn't take them out, which he counted as a win.

"Hey, Rosie," he called, tossing a pack of Christmas party hats into the cart. These actually were on the list. He didn't know where the next words came from, maybe the Christmas spirit had scrambled his brain because the words slipped out before he could stop himself: "Since I'm being dragged out here against my will, the least you could do is let me call this a date, don't you think?" Royal Road is the home of this novel. Visit there to read the original and support the author.

"What?!" She froze mid-step and turned to him, her face actually turning red.

"Th-this is not a date!" she stammered. Leander leaned in, amused by her uneasiness, and suddenly found confidence he clearly hadn't had before.

"You know, it's just the two of us, and I'm pushing the cart." He was committed now.

"And you're looking cute in that scarf. Feels like a date to me."

"We're buying snacks for kids," she retorted.

"Doesn't make it not a date." She stared at him for a long moment, glaring, then said, "You're an idiot." She went back to check her list on her gloved hand.

"Also, you're carrying everything home by yourself." He wanted to laugh. He almost did when he noticed how pink her ears were.

"We still need some eggs, flour, soda, and maybe chocolate, the fake kind, obviously," she said quickly, trying to change the subject.

"Come on, it's Christmas. Let the kids have some good chocolate for at least tonight."

"Leander," Rosie said firmly.

"I don't know if you've noticed, but we've got a budget meant for maybe five kids, and we're expected to stretch it for over fifteen." A wicked grin appeared on his face, then he reached low on the shelf beside them and grabbed a six-pack of what looked like the cheapest light beer the store had. He held it up to show her.

"Then we may as well go broke while having a good time." Her eyes widened in horror. She grabbed his arm, yanked the six-pack from his grip, and quickly shoved the beer back onto the shelf.

"What are you doing?! We can't have that! We're minors; we'll get in serious trouble if anyone sees us with it. And it's not like we can buy it anyway."

"Relax. I have my ways."

"Your ways?" she echoed skeptically.

"That's exactly the kind of phrase that gets you arrested." He didn't respond. Instead, he pulled out his phone, took a picture of the six-pack, and strolled toward the front of the store while typing a quick message.

"You'll see." They finished checking out their groceries, their budget stretched to its limit. They stepped outside, Leander carrying all two bags himself. A scruffy-looking guy was leaning against the corner of the store, glancing at Leander. He wore a black hoodie, had earbuds in, and bobbed his head to a high-pitched pop song. Leander noticed a crease forming between Rosie's brows as she watched the guy.

"Be careful," she murmured, nudging him lightly with her elbow.

"That weird guy just nodded at you." Leander followed her worried gaze, then grinned.

"Yo!" he called out to the guy, raising one arm. The guy looked up and grinned.

"Sup, my guy," he said, bumping fists with him after walking over.

"Got your six-pack. Don't get used to this, though. I'm only doing it this once because of the manga you lent me." The guy handed over a plastic bag.

"Don't worry, this is a one-time thing," Leander said, passing him a small roll of dollar bills.

"Thanks, and merry Christmas." The guy gave him a wink and left, his earbuds blasting.

"Who the hell was that?" Rosie demanded, blinking once, then twice.

"That was Hugo," Leander said, turning back to her. A smug look played on his face.

"We met at the library."

"The library?" she said, sounding unconvince.

"Yep." He walked past her, the bag bumping against his leg with each step.

"He was the only other guy hanging around the manga section for a few days straight, so we started talking and became friends. Turns out we share the same taste in shonen and bad decisions."

"Unbelievable," she said, catching up beside him.

"You made friends with a sketchy adult alcohol mule because you both like One Piece?"

"Actually," he corrected, holding up a finger.

"It was Chainsaw Man that started this beautiful friendship."

"Oh, well, that makes it fine then."

"I thought so too." Rosie shook her head in disbelief, but a slight smile slipped out, one she quickly hid as soon as Leander noticed.

"I should report you to Marie."

"You won't."

"How do you know?"

"Well, you could," he shrugged.

"But then you'd have to explain why you didn't stop the beer transaction." He winked.

"My partner in crime." She sighed, as if admitting defeat.

"You are the worst."

"And yet, you keep hanging out with me."

"Maybe I need to rethink who I spend my time with." Leander smirked.

"You've had plenty of chances, but you're still here." Rosie rolled her eyes and nudged him again on the side, and he counted it as a win. Moments later, they walked down the snowy street in silence, boots crunching softly over ice. Leander's hands weighed heavily with all the grocery bags, while Rosie scrolled on her phone, breath misting in the cold. The cold wind bit at his face, and he groaned.

"Everything is so overpriced nowadays," Rosie muttered, going over the receipt.

"Yeah," he agreed, catching up beside her.

"And we still forgot the milk."

"Noo… we needed milk for the cookies." She stopped and gasped, shoulders slumped. A knowing chuckle escaped his lips.

"I noticed we didn't have any before checking out, so the milk's on me," Leander said, nudging her leg with a bag.

"It's in this bag." Rosie glanced at him.

"Oh, that's… surprisingly responsible coming from you."

"Yeah, don't get used to it." A gust of cold wind rushed past, making Leander hunch his shoulders. Rosie shivered audibly.

"Be nice to have powers right about now," he muttered. Rosie blinked.

"What? Like… Superman?"

"Yeah. Flying would be useful." He shifted the grocery bags.

"Or, I don't know, super strength, fire, or whatever. Wouldn't have to freeze our butts off." Rosie laughed.

"That's what you'd use superpowers for? Not freezing?"

"I mean, yeah, but…" He trailed off, then shrugged.

"I think about it sometimes, me having powers and not just the flashy stuff, but powers that could change lives. Something that would make people take me seriously, make me invaluable. Something that would make me matter."

"That got personal fast," she said, giving him a long look. He felt his cheeks flush with heat despite the cold as she kept staring at him intently. Why did I say all of that? She probably thinks I'm stupid now. She finally spoke.

"But you matter already, dummy." She smiled with her eyes half closed.

"At least to me you do, and to everyone in the orphanage." A small crooked smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. Something about the way she said it, steady and certain, as if she actually meant it, made the cold air feel warm for a moment. He glanced at her, and she was quiet, watching the downtown lights in the distance.

"If I had powers, I'd just fly. Like, straight up. Past the clouds, where you can't hear anything, can't see anyone. Just you and the sky." She paused.

"That'd be nice." A brow lifted on its own; he was surprised by her honest answer.

"It's hard, huh?" he asked.

"I mean, all you do in the orphanage, out of everyone, you're the one with the most responsibility after Marie. It's gotta be draining, carrying all that weight." She shook her head.

"I don't mind it at all. I love it, actually, helping her out and everyone else. I love waking the little ones up, helping them get dressed, making sure they eat their breakfast." She looked down at her hands.

"Most kids have an actual mom who does that for them. I want the orphanage kids to feel like someone's there for them. I want them to feel a little more normal." He listened attentively to it all, as snow fell in soft, small flurries atop her head.

"However," she said. He looked down to see her expression dim a little.

"I still worry about the future. I know that soon, pretty soon, actually—we'll leave the orphanage and enter the real world. We'll get jobs, find our own place, and live alone, with no help and no one beside us anymore." She opened her palm to let the snow settle on it.

"I wish I could freeze time and stay like this forever, all of us together as a family." One bag almost slipped, so he tightened his grip and shifted his weight. For that moment, he truly wished he had powers so that he could freeze time and make that wish a reality for her, but he knew that wasn't feasible. What could he even say to that? Could he say something that would actually help? Should he?

"I know it's scary," he finally said after a big inhaled.

"What?"

"Growing up, getting a real job." He looked at her.

"But you're very smart. You'll figure it out. I'm sure you will."

"Thanks…" She looked at him with that vibrant yet gentle stare and smiled, holding his gaze as if daring him to hold it just as long. He looked away first. He always looked away first whenever things became too serious. That was the curse of cowards. They walked in silence for a while before Rosie asked quietly, "Do you ever think about her?"

"Sometimes." He didn't need to ask who she meant.

"But less than I used to." That wasn't entirely true. He thought about his little sister whenever he saw kids around her age. Though by now, she'd probably be fourteen or fifteen. Old enough to have a life she loved. People she called family. A bedroom with her name on the door. Old enough that they could walk right past each other without either realizing who the other was. Or maybe they would recognize each other…

but he wouldn't know what to say, because after so many years they would just be strangers, or perhaps she just wouldn't care for him. That possibility scared him more than he liked to admit. She'd been adopted only a few months after they became orphans. She had been five. He had been seven. He barely remembered her anymore, just the weight of her on his back when he used to give her piggyback rides, and the way she used to laugh when he made ugly faces, but he still hoped she had everything he imagined for her.

He really did. He just didn't know what he'd be to her now. A brother she'd spent her life wondering about… or just a stranger showing up at the door to disturb a happy life. A long time ago, he'd decided that if she was happy, then that was enough. He would leave it alone. It was either the right call or the easy one. Probably both.

"You could try to find her," Rosie mentioned quietly. She'd said it before.

"I know."

"But you won't."

"She was almost four when they separated us. She doesn't remember me. Or if she does, it won't be the way I remember her. I'd just be some guy showing up and saying we're related." He shifted the bags again.

"I don't want to be that for her."

"That's either very selfless," she said, "or very cowardly. Hard to tell the difference sometimes." She nudged his arm. He let her.

"You never told me her name," she said.

"Hmm. I guess I never did," he replied, looking up into the cloudy night." Ilaria." She looked at him.

"Ilaria. That's a pretty name."

"Well, damn, what do we have here?" The peace, the moment, everything shattered as they suddenly turned the corner. Just two blocks from the orphanage, two guys leaning against the wall ahead looked over and sneered.

"What a hottie," the skinny one who had just spoken added, a cigarette dangling precariously from his lips as he eyed Rosie from head to toe. Leander felt on edge almost instantly and moved slightly closer to Rosie without thinking. The two bums looked to be in their early twenties, both wearing thin leather jackets that surely weren't warm enough for the temperature, and their pants sagged two sizes too big.

"Didn't know angels walked around this part of town," said the other. This one was plump, with a childlike face, though his bald head betrayed his real age. Rosie's cheerful glow vanished, and her face went taut. She stepped closer to Leander and gave them a nasty look." Not interested," she said firmly, then swung her head, her ponytail wagging as she quickened her pace, trying to get past them.

"Cold day to be out with your little boyfriend," the bald guy said, getting in front of her and eyeing Leander.

"He's not my boyfriend," Rosie replied flatly. Don't have to be so defensive about it. Her statement stung more than he would like to admit. The cigarette guy stepped closer.

"Boy, why don't you keep carrying the groceries and move along while the princess hangs out with some real men?"

"Sorry, guys," Leander said, stepping between them and Rosie.

"She's not into cliché bad guys who smell like gas station hot dogs."

"What'd you say?" the skinny one glowered.

"You got a lot of balls for a guy built like a Q-tip," the plump one growled, looming over Leander.

"It's part of my charm," Leander said, biting back a curse. He'd heard worse, but the words still stung. He already knew exactly what he looked like: bony, short, and with a head too big for his body. His build always reminded him of one of those bobblehead toys people stuck on car dashboards.

"Leander, come on. Let's just go." His sleeve stretched as Rosie pulled him forward. The fat bald guy suddenly reached for Rosie and yanked her by her scarf.

"Hey, who said you could go?" The tug made her stumble and slip on the icy sidewalk. She grabbed onto Leander's arm just in time, barely avoiding splitting her head on the pavement.

"Rosie!" Leander shouted with worry, eyes wide, as he instinctively reached out to bring her up.

"Are you okay?" Rosie nodded shakily.

"I'm alright." A sudden tension clenched in his chest as he shifted his gaze to the bastard.

"What the hell is your problem?" The smoker flicked his cigarette aside, the ember hissing as it died in the snow.

"Shut up, pussy." Before Leander could react, the man stepped in and slammed a fist into his gut.