Chương 92: The One In Which There Was A Giant Crab

Each step I took flared pain in my ankles. I did something to the tendons in them when I took the entire weight of the crab on me, and it was harsh enough that no amount of shock was getting me through it yet. Every step was like it was on hot coals, jabbing me with hot jabs of criticism for letting myself get into this fucking position. Only thing that hurt worse was seeing the crab in this position. It only attacked me, and only after I attacked it.

Now it was jabbing its legs out into the air, stabbing for ground that wasn't there. It probably had no idea what was happening. Tancred's voice, as though I needed further upset, decided to punish my ears.

"Hercules, I gotta say. You scare me." My shoulders fought against me lifting my hand up to touch my earpiece, but I still managed it.

"That's the best you could come up with?"

"No, I'm genuinely a bit too put off for the banter right now. You just fucking made history. The only people who've manhandled kaiju are heroes on the national and international stage. The Saint, Guapo Galera, Leo Aureus in England, Gevaudan in France. You're the fifth man to ever actually incapacitate a kaiju." An exhale shuddered its way out from me, unable to get a smooth release due to the soreness in my body.

"Doesn't feel like it. Feels like it kicked my ass by just walking over me."

"Well yeah, moron-" there was the attitude I knew Tancred had in him.

"You are sure as shit not built for doing that normally. But since you could do it, once this bullshit's over we'll put priority on figuring out why and how you did."

"Great," I sighed out, stumbling my way over to a barely-surviving bench to sit down.

"Any news on the Smythe guy?"

"Oh, yeah. He was cooperative. He claims he was unaware and just assumed the guy was a private dealer. We were able to collect them, and the payload should be on its way. God bless the F-35. As for the others…" Silence.

"Seems like Teiú is getting there solo. You have a couple of minutes." I sighed, leaning back against the bench as I suddenly heard the clinking and clicking of… spurs? Looking off to my right, towards the sound, it was Texas Tornado sauntering over, hands in his pockets.

"You got enough room on the bench for a second?" I slid over a bit and nodded.

"Go ahead." With a lot more grace than I myself could muster when walking, he strutted to and onto the bench, taking a seat. He tugged his hat off, a thick mop of blonde hair being revealed under it as he fanned himself with the brim.

"Goodness, what a day. That your first kaiju? Not including in your mask." My gaze sat across the road, towards one of the buildings. Another hotel. Made me think of the hotel I apparently didn't even think of, because I was off in Quinby, where I allegedly killed a kaiju. I couldn't even figure out if Tancred was lying to me.

"Yeah," I answered.

"First time ever." He let out a laugh.

"Sorry for such a crazy first impression, then. But you did splendid, sport," he noted in his thick drawl, patting my shoulder.

"There's a lot of young heroes like you, who in their first real monster situation, get cold feet. They decide to just run off, handle evac. Even the ones who say they're the real strong types."

"I had the chance to do something, to help. I wasn't going to just make them run away from their homes because of this."

"They had to evacuate regardless, since for all we know this thing could blow up in a big nuclear mushroom cloud." I turned towards him, my mask not doing a great job of hiding my gaze.

"Sorry. Poor banter," he admitted, setting his hat in his lap.

"Unfortunately you get a bit too used to the gallows humor on this job. Keeps you from turning real jaded. That's when people become real killers." My gaze didn't waver. If anything, it sharpened.

"I can tell you ain't one." He noted.

"Up 'til me, every man in my family served. Every single one of 'em a killer. I didn't believe in it. Don't believe God put us on this beautiful Earth to kick others off of it. Nearly cost me the family ranch when I told my daddy that."

"Why're you telling me this?"

"We heard the news back when it happened, Hercules. I know why you tried this on the crab. You don't wanna kill it. You're still too tensed up on what happened with that incident." A gloved hand reached out and tapped my chest.

"Sit upright, son, you did good today and you should be proud. Plus I don't like talking to slouchers." He pushed hard enough on my chest to make me have to sit upright, hands resting on my knees as I tried to keep myself posted up.

"My back's not really a fan of sitting straight right now."

"It'll become one soon enough, you gotta work through it to get used to it. Now, as I was saying. I don't want you to let yourself be defined by one big mistake. If we weren't made to slip in our judgments, we wouldn't have the ability to judge. Besides, plenty of cops and soldiers have had to do what you did. No one has the right to judge you for something those guys do all the time."

"I- I don't care about being judged," I hissed out, looking off towards the crab.

"I care about knowing that the threats in front of me are actually threats. I don't know if the person I killed was an innocent or not. That wood, it eats people, overtakes them."

"And?" My neck snapped my head back towards him. My arms were tensed.

"What the fuck do you mean'And?'" He seemed unbothered, one leg crossing over the other.

"Son, you just exonerated yourself. You yourself said that 'that wood' overtakes them. You may have just saved that poor son of a gun from a life of suffering. So if he's innocent, you saved him in the only way possible. You think a veterinarian's evil for putting down a dog with terminal cancer?"

"No, but, that's their job." He nodded.

"You're right, son, it is their job. And you're a superhero. Your job's to save people too. Saving people, most of the time, does mean you're keeping people alive. But what's most important is you're saving their lives. If that poor man's life was locked under that wood, you saved that life by wrenching it free from the wood." I thought back to that addition, behind the manor. The one that burned, with the men inside it. One begging to be killed before a root shut it up. Was the person I killed the same?

"And," Tex added, interrupting my thoughts.

"Let's say it wasn't an innocent man. Then you were just fighting a supervillain in a do-or-die. There are superheroes who are perfectly fine with stopping a supervillain who goes so far as killing people. I got a quote for you, from this English fella'. Men aren't hanged for stealing horses, but that horses may not be stolen."

"And how many horse thieves have you hanged?" I asked. He toyed with the brim of his hat between his gloved fingers, looking up towards the sky. This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.

"Two. I pray to God every day that He forgive me for them and make sure there's never a third. Not to protect my heart from what I've done, I've long-since accepted it. But so that none are hurt as badly as the people those two men hurt. But if the need arises, I will do what's needed to protect others." There was then silence for about a minute, maybe. The other Forces of Nature cheering and talking amongst themselves. Buzzbird seemed a bit more distant, crossing his arms and observing the crab.

"Did my words do anything for you, son?" I took a deep breath.

"No idea. Never been good at figuring my stuff out." While I wasn't looking at him, I could hear the slapping of his knees before he stood and fixed his hat back on.

"That's alright, son. Nothing's instant. Just sit with it for a while, okay? Don't let outcomes completely outweigh intentions. It takes two to tango. And until that dance is perfect, don't let every misstep throw off your rhythm." He then sauntered back off towards the group. It must've felt so easy to him. He knew exactly what he had dealt with. Crystal clear. if I knew if this person was innocent and I saved them, that would be nice.

If I knew they signed up for it and were a threat that couldn't live, that would also be fine. But they just don't get it. If I knew who I killed, it'd be fine. I could work with that. My problem is that I'll never have an answer. Felt like it was always like this. Always going to be like this. For the person I killed. For me not knowing. All we got were elegant words. At the same time Tex departed, Buzzbird was approaching. Him and Texas Tornado exchanged a high five before he reached me, arms crossed.

"Hey. Was just handling some calls. Got a couple of things to bring up, if you don't mind."

"Shoot. Still waiting on the eggs."

"Our media guy, Adam Witts. He wanted to do an interview. Would… be after all of this. Would you be interested? Maybe get your thoughts out? You deserve to speak your piece. Especially after…" He gestured to the crab.

"That."

"I…" I trail off, before shrugging.

"I don't fucking know, man. I just got a bunch of speeches and lectures from your boss, not sure how much I care for PR speak right now."

"Fine by me. Your PR agent has public contact info, I'll make sure Adam gives him a call at a better time. The other thing is, Crimson Coyote sent some texts. Turns out crabs talk by vibrating. So I should be able to let the mama know the eggs are on the way, once Coyote's ready to do the translating. You want me to apologize to it for you? You have no hard feelings for it, after all. Right?" Looking up, so I could face Buzzbird instead of just his waist, I nodded.

"Yeah. I think I do."

"Awesome, once the eggs are here we ca-" KRNNNK Dirt and dust kicked up next to me. Turning towards it, I saw Jairo stepping out from the kicked-up cloud. On his back was this cooler of some kind. About the size of a refrigerator." Hey! Herc!

"He buzzed out. Must be fully transformed." Help! Please!?" Buzzbird coughed as the dust polluted the air, before he generated a whirring force that billowed it all out of the air.

"God, that's gonna take a few years off my lungs," he complained. Pushing myself off my feet, I carefully lifted the cooler off of his back and set it on the ground.

"Where are Flowstate and Spectroma?" I asked." Ha d t o!" His buzzing reverted to a more normal croaking.

"I was faster than a copter so I just carried it here. They're getting picked up." That felt a bit inefficient, but I wasn't in any position to complain about an early arrival. Forcing the crate open, I could see a huge pile of those baseball-sized eggs. In collection, they smelled actually terrible I gagged at the aroma, as even with my mask it was just too potent.

"Definitely some kind of sea creature's eggs," I wheezed out before turning away.

"I've smelled better septic tanks!" Buzzbird blurted out with a groaning gag, covering his mouth.

"Not in the mask, not in the mask- this thing's a pain to clean-!" He stumbled back, sending out more vibrations to try and keep the putrid air away.

"Can't believe a rich guy wanted to eat these," I coughed out. Unfortunately, Buzzbird's attempts to remove the smell came too late. Not for us, but for the mother. The occasional fidgeting for ground was replaced by a panicked flail, as a building-sized claw had swung for us. Jairo and I were a lot more in sync than I thought, given we both lunged to intercept the claw, a heavy THOOM being made as it slammed into us. My sore body screamed at me to let go, that it had enough.

"Buzzbird! Talk to it!" I shouted, not even facing him. My entire body had to focus on this stupid claw. Mama wanted its kids back, but we needed to get that all set first. Buzzbird yelled out some apology I could barely hear. But I could feel him floating through the air as those weird vibrating wings came past us, landing right on the claw. Laying a palm on the claw, his other hand dialed a number.

"Hey, Weaver! Need Coyote to do that crab communication thing sooner! I texted him the script! Hold his phone up to him so he can read and do it!" He could've just asked to get this stuff pre-sent before. Moron. The wait for a response felt like forever, but finally there was some measure of buzzing in its claw. Rhythmic. Consistent. I could put together what Buzzbird was saying while he was doing it.

"Throw guy sorry! Have eggs! Giving eggs! Calm! Friend! Calm! Giving eggs! Calm giving eggs! Calm!" The pressure on us lightened up until the claw went slack. Not limp. It was still alive. Just stopped. Another buzz. Buzzbird didn't explain that one. He yelled down to us.

"The eggs need to go into its apron! You gotta climb on and move under its belly. You'll find a spot with a bunch of hairs! The eggs will attach! I can't promise it'll sit still for long, so be fast!" Rushing over to that awful-smelling cooler, I hefted it up and lunged onto the claw, rushing along its body in hopes of finding whatever he was talking about. I could hear the roar of jet engines as I moved along. Looking back, that fighter jet was already pulling into view. Buzzbird was flying up to greet it.

Serendipitous timing. I ended up finding this almost grotto-looking part of the crab's stomach, with a bunch of what looked like almost grass in it. Must have been the hairs Buzzbird told us about. Tipping the cooler down slowly, the eggs rolled into the grassy spot, sticking after a few seconds of movement, the little hairs clinging tightly. While I was making sure all the eggs got stuck in the hairs, Buzzbird hovered down with the few remaining eggs, which he gently planted in the hair pile.

"These things feel weird. Snotty."

"I don't think we probably felt any better as babies," I wheeze out. That got a laugh from Buzzbird, before he placed a palm on the "ground" below us. The crab's stomach. More vibrations.

"Eggs. Home. Lifting. Friend. Water. Water." Standing back up, he dusted his hands off, empty crate under his arm.

"You guys are gonna have to lift her up." I nodded.

"There was another shake you did, on its claw, you didn't yell out what that was. What was it?"

"No real single word for it. Kind of like a 'Thank you for cooperating.' Coyote said it was complicated." I squinted, but just shook my head off.

"Can you drop me off to the other side so I can help it up?" He agreed, and we ended up gathering around the other side, slowly piling the creature up. Even Jack-o-Lantern used his weird fire stick to make a pry bar to help with lifting it up. Finally on its feet, it began to trudge back to the water. It was surprisingly careful.

"…It really just wanted its eggs," I huffed out, exhausted.

"Ain't that something. Didn't even know kaiju could really have babies," Texas Tornado mentioned.

"Guess we'll have to keep an eye out in the future," he mused. There was a weight off of my sore body. I managed to save the people in Virginia Beach. And I managed to save the crab. If I didn't get its eggs, they would've found a way to kill it. I stopped it. We stopped i- Tree. It just came out of nowhere. Taller than every building in the area. Hurtling through the air, from the top of the tree, was a black dot. But I could tell, even from this distance, that it was a person. Humanoid.

Springing from it came a mass. Long as the road the crabbed walked. A great blade, that blotted the sun. Thick, gnarled wood, sharpened to a point. SHWING The crab took two steps further. Then only one half took another step, before both fell limp, leaned against opposite buildings. The figure landed. The wooden knight. Gleditsia.

"Behold! I, a true hero, have slain the monster!" The noise I howled out could have been measured on the Richter scale.