Chương 52: Chapter 51: A Clash of Ideals

++Being exposed to differing opinions was another example of something I had not gotten used to before my rebirth. There are relatively few chances for debate when you are the Lord of Evil. ++ - From the writings of Isabel Vornholt, 'The Great Lich'. 1, 891 A. E.

"Guard up!" Paula snapped, just a moment before her magic missile shot for me with all the speed of a sling stone. Magic of our level was nothing close to the velocity of bullets of this modern era, but even with Paula's modest amounts of raw power, it was a good deal more impactful. My barrier was only half-formed when the missile impacted and split it in half, throwing a rainbow spectrum of coloured sparks in all directions and pushing past to hit my chest.

Had we not been allowed to borrow the enchanted training gear used at the Winzorth Institute's official sparring sessions, I would have been injured. Maybe killed. Instead I was just flung from my feet, an event I was growing tiringly used to by now. My body tumbled and stopped in a heap, its limbs all caught up in one another and its bones aching somewhat from the fall. Paula was by my side instantly, looking down and looking concerned.

"Are you okay? Gods, I'm so sorry Isabel I—" —"I am fine," I snapped, crawling up to my knees and glaring at her.

"I do not need a second mother, stop your fawning and get back into position."

"Isabel, too far!" Agrian was standing to the side, giving both of us room—there was a lot of room to give, in the main training hall—but still on hand in case something required him. Apparently, he thought this conversation required him. Paula was not as offended as him, oddly enough. I saw the old frost return to her face and was pleased by it.

"I was just making sure you weren't hurt," she hissed.

"No need to be a bitch."

"Well do not make sure again," I shot back. I was fully on my feet now, looking around to see the damage dealt. The grand hall was, above all things, grand, and its floor was solid stone. I had not even scratched it in my tumble. Paula and I got back into our positions, and this time I made sure I was fully focused before the magic started flying.

"Wait," Agrian cut in suddenly. Both myself and Paula glared his way.

"What?!" we snapped, glanced at each other, and glared harder.

"I want to tag in," Agrian said.

"Let me spar with Paula, you two always go at it." He had a point, I had to admit.

"Fine," I sighed. Paula looked more reluctant.

"Are you sure?" she asked him.

"I know you're not as—" —"I'm five years older than my sister, anything she can take, I can take." He always got prickly when the topic of his talent against mine came up, being the world's second greatest prodigy would tend to do that apparently. We swapped places, and now it was my turn to watch. Agrian and Paula readied their defences, then froze and stared at one another. I could recognise why.

Paula was actually the better duelist between them, I could only assume she had spent a good deal of her magical studies practicing combat. I wondered why that was. On the other hand, Agrian had more than her measure for power and skill. His arsenal was bigger, and he had more practice in battle than most of the Institute's students as well, just not as much as her. It was Agrian who made his move first, of course.

Youth and eagerness threw his magic out as surely as his own intentions, and I watched a sparking ball of power scream across the space between them. It was more powerful than mine, but not because of Agrian's own strength.

"You idiot!" I roared, shocked that even he could show such a lack of control. This was nearly a full-strength blast, if it struck Paula she may die even through her protective wear. By the time I had spoken, the impact had already happened. Paula's barrier broke, but so did the magic missile. It was powerful enough that something comparable to shrapnel broke off from it, little beads of stray energy sent spraying across the room and churning up its floor.

Solid stone, still, but pockmarked and pitted like a bunch of drunken soldiers had started unloading their pistols into it. Paula would have died to that without a doubt if it connected. Even through her shield, she took a thrashing. I found myself being the one calling out this time, rushing over to her side in a way that I thought was rather undignified and most certainly would not have allowed myself to indulge in normally.

"Are you hurt?" I asked her. Healing magic was not something I had been taught just yet, nor had I ever actually learned it in my past life. It is of…limited utility for the undead. I was regretting that lack now, Paula had all the makings of a very useful pawn. But, fortunately, she lived. Not only did she live, she retained all higher brain function and had not even suffered any broken bones. She was energetic enough to spring right to her feet and glare at Agrian.

"What the fuck was that?!" I reinforced her glare with my own, though did not feel the need to say anything. Agrian's gaze withered before ours, and my brother took a step back as his face burned.

"Sorry I…was…I was showing off, got too rough…I forgot you weren't…you know. A man." If there had been an exact wrong thing to say, Agrian surely deserved credit for finding it with such devastating precision.

"Showing off what, how many pets you went through as a child?" Paula's temper was fizzling out somewhat, but it was far from calmed. If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.

"That was stupid," I added to the tirade, speaking in a somewhat calmer tone.

"Do not do it ag—hrngh." A twinge of pain ran down my innards as I tried to speak, and I was forced to take a moment to catch my breath. By the time I looked up, I realised eyes were now on me, just as concerned as before.

"I am fine," I snapped, before either of them could ask.

"I was not hurt by your idiot spell," I added to Paula.

"I just feel…My stomach aches, and my side." I felt my new face burn as I said it. A stomach ache, it was such a mundane thing to be hurt by, but I had to admit the pain was gnawing at me. Worse, now, in a spike, but it had been an irritation since last night. Waking me up in my bed and sending hot pains right through me. Agrian was grinning, more with relief than mockery.

"You're sure you're okay?"

"If you ask me that again, I will make sure you are far less okay than you think I am," I spat. He looked even more relieved at that. Paula, meanwhile, had an interesting expression.

"You're feeling what exactly?" she asked. I got the feeling she knew more than me, and did not like it.

"My sides throb, and the section of my torso just below my stomach. I also feel tired, and I think my head is starting to hurt. Do you know what this affliction is, is that it? Do you know how to cure it?" She was grinning now, and I did not like it one bit. She clearly did know something I did not.

"You're not sick," she assured me.

"Just uh…hm, you might want to…keep a towel handy and avoid any heavy exercise."

"What in the world is that supposed to mean?" I spat. I found out a few hours later. Living as a man, and then being almost murdered to transform myself a few decades later into a lich, had prepared me for many things. Menstruating was clearly not one of them. Apparently an education in the Winzorth Institute had not prepared many of my peers for it, either, because I quickly learned that even being seen to bleed was considered some order of embarrassment.

Fortunately, I did not learn this by suffering the humiliation myself—that would have damaged my reputation and set back my goals of gaining influence by an unacceptable amount. I learned it because just after my bleeding first started, and I put the towel Paula had advised I get to good use, the woman knocked upon my new quarters' door and hastily whisked herself inside.

This new chamber was closer to both the dungeon and the Grandmaster's quarters, likely by design, and was also a good deal bigger, with no less than three rooms; a living space, a sleeping area and a bathroom with entirely functional plumbing and magically-heated hot water. It was this third room we retreated to then.

"You're going to do this monthly," she told me.

"I know," I glowered. I had seen enough of women and their bodies to be familiar with the broadstrokes, I had just not expected them to apply to me so soon. Another twinge of pain lanced through me, and drew out a curse.

"Bastard reproductive organs, obey me!" they did not. Paula seemed to find the sight of my anger terribly amusing.

"You're going to have to get used to this, Isabel," she sighed.

"Here, let's get you cleaned up first." I was not sure what she meant by that, before she pulled out a long cloth and I drew the obvious conclusion.

"You wish to tie that around my backside?"

"Technically, just above it. Here, let me—" —"I can do it myself," I snapped. This was one indignity too many, my days of having my private parts handled by another person ended when I gained the ability to walk. Paula seemed oddly insistent on showing me, but eventually caved to my superior will and waited outside the room as I saw to myself. She talked as I did, perhaps thinking I would appreciate some sort of distraction and find it alleviating. I actually just found it distracting.

"I was the only girl in my house, you know, when I had… this, for the first time. Didn't know what to make of it. My father just refused to talk about it at all, my brothers knew less than me obviously. It… wasn't great." Ah, so that was why she was meddling with me so much. She saw this as some way of preventing me from experiencing the same thing as her at the Winzorth Institute. It was her good deed for the month, I supposed.

Come to think of it, she was probably hoping to make this her good deed for every month. Once I was towelled I emerged from the bathroom to find Paula had set something up on the sofa, a warming pan, I recognised. One of the less advanced but more convenient inventions of the new era, it comprised a hollow cylinder with walls just thick enough to leave it slightly insulated. Inside, it was made to store hot coals and slowly radiate out their warmth. Good for keeping beds heated without the use of expensive magic.

I was not sure what this one was meant for.

"Try it against your lower back," Paula advised. I lay down across the sofa and did just that, feeling the relief come near-instantly.

"Better?" she asked knowingly.

"It is…adequete," I admitted. She grinned.

"My first time led to a lot of nasty trial and error. I didn't have anyone to turn to for help, I don't want you to feel that same way now." She seemed to be thinking out loud, and I found the thoughts disgusting.

"You still do not," I told her.

"Nor do I." I made myself sit up, though it sent another spasm of agony through my epicentre.

"All people are your enemies, no matter how much you think otherwise. You cannot rely on them, they will fail you in the end. Or turn on you." Paula's face fell instantly, and I was revolted to see it turn with pity.

"Where is this coming from, Isabel?"

"From knowledge and wisdom," I snarled.

"You will save yourself a lot of pain later if you simply accept this now." I only wished someone had been around to tell me this in my first life, before I was led out from my village and into near-death. Perhaps this was my good deed for the month. Paula did not appear receptive to my advice, however. I could still see her face from where I sat, and watched how it folded up with concern.

"That's not true at all," she told me.

"My father, my brothers, Gods know they're not perfect, but I know they're there for me."

"You think they are," I informed her.

"Just be ready to do without them when you need to. That time will come eventually, one way or another." It was the greatest kindness I could show her, warning her like that, and I decided she had earned as much from me by helping with my new condition. The conversation had also distracted me from it, somewhat, though even now the ache in my lower abdomen was…irritating.

"And Agrian, what about him? Is he going to let you down?"

"He already has," I told her evenly.

"You…love him, though?" I could not help but bristle. What was love? Instinct that kept primitive animals together in a hostile and dangerous world, for a being like myself it was completely superfluous.

"Yes," I lied. There was no advantage to letting my real self shine through at this stage. Paula was silent at that for a while as she sat there, and I found myself becoming irritated at her presence.

"Why are you asking all of these questions?" I demanded at last.

"Because I want to understand what could have happened to a little girl to leave her so hurt." I straightened even more where I sat, and ignored the burning pain in my back and belly, having a more pressing concern.

"Out," I hissed.

"Get out, now!" Paula did not look the least bit surprised, deftly climbing to her feet and heading for the door.

"I'm sorry, Isabel, for whatever—" —"Begone!" I roared again, and the very act of shouting sent more waves of agony rising up from my wretched reproductive system.

"I will not have you pitying me, not you." Her eyes frosted over.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked me.

"That I am not accepting pity from someone pathetic enough to be tied down with love for the people who have done nothing but fail them. Now go." She stood there and trembled, looking like she had a hundred things to say and was agonized by possessing only one mouth with which to say them. Then, after a few more moments spent resembling a volcano at the brink of eruption, she turned and headed out from the room, leaving me alone.

I lay back on the sofa, returned my bed warmer to its comforting position, and began to focus on mana-strengthening exercises, suddenly eager for something more to distract myself.