Chương 60: S.04 Memory of the Clock 11(01)

Scene 01. Perhaps we are living in abundance because we keep our past memories as companions. No, surely that is the case. The abundance our past memories carried may have given us all good memories, happiness, and an enormous debt. An eternal debt that can never be repaid. A light that we must repay by living happily, by loving, by giving everything we have — yet a light that, no matter what, will never be repaid in full.

Sprawled flat on her back across the living room floor, Ji-young opened her eyes before the morning came and stared at the ceiling with her earphones in. From the rooms came a fair amount of snoring. From Si-yeon's room downstairs, and from upstairs where Gyeong-seo and Yeon-su were staying, the sounds drifted down. But to Ji-young's ears, lying beneath the moonlight, the snoring barely registered. A small melody played near her ear.

The calm sound of an acoustic guitar reached her, but what filled Ji-young's mind was only a tangle of feelings. Letting out a small breath, Ji-young flicked her right ankle resting on her raised left knee. She was keeping rhythm unconsciously, but only because she knew the song well enough to flick her foot — the melody stirred no joy in her. It was not that kind of song to begin with. It was a memory her mother had passed to her. It was the warmth her mother had helped her feel.

It was a path her mother had carved so she could push through every trial. It was a song her mother had truly loved. Now, only the weight of her own decision remained. Ji-young had far more places to lean on than she had thought. She believed the people willing to help her would only grow in number. The time had been short, and not every heart had been won, but the count was certainly rising, one by one. They were all bonds her mother had woven. That was why it weighed so heavy. That was why it felt so dense.

In the dawn hours when sleep would not come, Ji-young slowly raised herself and looked through the wide living room window at the chilly garden beyond. Unlike the city, the hilltop was free of light pollution, and the moon's glow lit the surroundings. She had not realized the moon could be this bright. Ji-young, who had meant to coax sleep on the warmer-than-expected living room floor, finally gave up on the sleep that refused to arrive and quietly pulled her coat over her shoulders.

After tugging her long hair out from under the coat, she carefully opened the firmly shut front door. With a reluctant step, Ji-young left the 별채(Byeol-chae_Detached Quarters) in the early dawn. After leaving a brief note for So-hui, Ji-young listened to everyone's snoring as she tried to slip quietly out of the living room — and then a familiar presence followed at her back. Deep night, before the sun had risen. Si-yeon stood watching Ji-young in silence.

Ji-young turned with startled eyes and saw Si-yeon — wearing a face exactly like her own — standing right there. Ji-young's whisper reached Si-yeon. Ji-young: Sorry, did I wake you? Half-asleep, Si-yeon shook her head with a soft smile. Neither of them was dressed warmly. Si-yeon stepped out through the door Ji-young had opened. The fairly spacious garden looked far from ready to take on its green. The wind that filled the surroundings was crisp to Ji-young and Si-yeon, but would have been brutal to anyone else.

Si-yeon: Why are you sneaking out so quietly. Ji-young: Have to go. Everyone'll worry. Si-yeon: Sis. Ji-young: Yeah. Si-yeon was not facing Ji-young — she walked beside her, the two of them strolling the garden quietly together. When Ji-young answered the call, Si-yeon cleared her throat and spoke. Si-yeon: Thanks. Ji-young: Hm. For what? Si-yeon: I'm a thick-skull, so I can't put it into words properly, but I get it. Just — that you're going through hardcore shit. That you're living the hardcore life in our place.

Ji-young: There's no "in your place." You're going through it too. Si-yeon: Random thought, but I don't get why I said what I did to So-hui. Ji-young: What did you say? Si-yeon: The day I dropped dead, So-hui mentioned you, and I snapped back at her —"Oh, so that woman's doing it in your place, then?" Just to dig the knife in. Ji-young, hearing this very Si-yeon-style confession, burst out laughing despite herself.

Si-yeon: Like, suddenly that brat starts saying comforting shit, and I'm like, am I really fucking dead, and even while everything's a piece of shit, she's running her mouth about helping me, so honestly at first I thought she was a fucking scammer. Ji-young: So why'd it suddenly come back to you? This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience. Si-yeon: 'Cause it feels like you're doing my share of the hardcore life, sis.

At Si-yeon's quiet confession, Ji-young softened her laugh and shook her head. Si-yeon: Driver ajeossi seems really sorry too. Ji-young: Aigoo, that ajeossi. Si-yeon: He said something similar to what you say. Ji-young: "Look at yourself"? Si-yeon nodded. Ji-young: Those words — that ajeossi was the first to ever say them to me. Si-yeon: Figured. Ji-young: But unlike his words, I myself wasn't able to be honest. Yeah, back then it really was hard. How do I put it.

I should've told you everything I was carrying, should've asked you to walk it with me — that would've been the right thing, the obvious thing. But till the end I kept lying to myself. Ji-young did not speak for a long while. The two who had been walking side by side passed beyond the garden and reached the gate outside. Carrying a weight she could not lighten, Ji-young finally answered. Si-yeon: Mom must've had it the hardest. Ji-young: Right. It was the first time we'd ever lost something.

What mother in the world would want to leave it like that. She must've had it the hardest. Mom. Ji-young lightly held up the bracelet wrapped around her wrist. Ji-young: Honestly, I didn't know I'd be dragged off by a traffic accident either. When the car flipped, my mind went completely blank. Having sorted through the past for a moment, Ji-young straightened her chest with a slightly lighter heart. Her exhale carried a white plume. Ji-young stopped walking and looked at Si-yeon for a beat.

The one who spoke first was Si-yeon, who had also halted. Si-yeon: Must be hardcore. For you, sis. For real. Hardcore as fuck. Ji-young returned Si-yeon's consolation with a wide smile. Ji-young: I'm fine. I took it on for that reason. So you guys can be more at ease. I need to face our actual enemy as fast as possible. How long can I keep being torn between people. We've got so far to go. After exchanging those whispered words, Ji-young turned and headed for her car.

Si-yeon walked alongside Ji-young and abruptly threaded her arm through Ji-young's. Si-yeon: Sis. Ji-young, unsurprised, gently covered Si-yeon's hand — colder than her own — with her own. Ji-young: Yeah. Si-yeon: I think — leaving traces of you in Mom's room wouldn't be so bad. You're the one who resembles our mom most. Even if you're not her real daughter, you're the one who carries the most of her. Ji-young: So you heard, huh — embarrassing. Watching Ji-young's awkward expression, Si-yeon smiled lightly.

Si-yeon, who had overheard the conversation between Ji-young and So-hui, only nodded slowly without a word. Ji-young: No. I alone can't fill all of Mom. It's because you're all here that it works. Si-yeon: Well, do we have to fill her? So what if it's different. Hell, even I'm different from you. Fucking mirrors of each other, and we're still different — so what if it's different from Mom. We can just call it a side of Mom we didn't really know. To Si-yeon's comfort, Ji-young answered with a bright smile.

Ji-young got into the car and started the engine. Si-yeon stepped up to the open driver's window. Si-yeon: See you later. Be careful. Ji-young: If it gets hardcore, tell me — I'll switch with you. Si-yeon: Ha, seriously, you really treat me like a damn idiot, huh? It was Si-yeon's scolding without any bite. Ji-young pursed her lips into a smirk, as if she had heard a familiar nag. Si-yeon: I've still got my own debt to pay back, in my own way, so don't worry — just be careful yourself.

To Si-yeon's grumbling concern, Ji-young nodded. Ji-young: Yeah. You be careful too. Following Si-yeon's small laugh and nod, Ji-young drove off. Sunday dawn. Ji-young drove toward the light cresting at the horizon. Scene 02. Driving in, Ji-young turned on the audio and tapped her fingers against the steering wheel. Humming and keeping the rhythm, Ji-young cruised easily down the road that ran between the narrow stretch of forest, picking up a little speed.

The sunlight that had begun to rise beyond the horizon was throwing a halo of light, pouring beams down between the mountain ridges. The moment she turned her car onto the narrow access road, a massive blast erupted and Ji-young's car was flung into the air. A black current of water shot up without the faintest warning. The black current surged with violence, slamming the underside of the car and flipping the vehicle Ji-young was in within an instant. Black wire glinted from the overturning car.

Cutting through the flipping chassis, Ji-young stepped out and dropped lightly to the ground. Across from Ji-young, who was wearing workout clothes, an unfamiliar presence slid forward together with a viscous, oozing current of water. The moment she saw the presence — those two black eyes locked dead-on, the hand pulling black water up from the ground — Ji-young spun her body and lightly evaded the surging water.

The presence appeared in front of Ji-young in a blink, seized her throat with a hand soaked in a sickeningly dark jade current, and slammed her down into the ground with full force. Driving Ji-young's head into the ground over and over, the strikes split the back of her skull and burst blood across the floor. Ji-young pulled herself together against the dimming of her senses and lashed out with her 현사(Hyeon-sa_Black Wire), severing the presence's arm whole.

She wrapped the wire around a tree trunk and yanked her body free in a flash. The blood streaming from her head clotted in moments, but it would take time before she could steady her swimming vision. Shaking her head briefly to right her sight, Ji-young narrowly slipped past the presence's grasping hand as it lunged at her again, then locked her two legs around the green-current-soaked throat of the presence and hurled it backward with all her strength.

The black body of the presence slammed into a tree and burst apart in every direction. The black water — laced with a faintly green light — splattered out and rotted a whole tree to the core. Ji-young pulled her foot back fast to dodge the current that erupted from beneath her, but the presence's hand seized her again and flung her bodily into the very tree it had crashed into. Ji-young's stomach was punched straight through by a branch, and a massive pain tore through her. Ji-young coughed up blood.

After lashing out with the Black Wire to slice the entire tree in two, Ji-young dropped her body downward. The presence's strike whipped up across the front of Ji-young's face. As Ji-young's body twisted backward from the blow, the presence shaped a current of black water directly beneath her and swallowed her whole. Scene 03. Presences — half their faces rotted — stared down at Ji-young, the remaining halves exposed in every direction.

Ji-young thrashed inside the murky jade current spawned from others' blood, trying anything to break free. You died because of me. I died in your place. Why are you the one living over there. I'll live in your place. You stay here. I won't forgive you. I died for you. You're happy, aren't you? I want to be happy too. You took it. You took everything. There's nothing left for me, but you've lost nothing. Are you happy? Are you content? Got it all? Are you happy? Are you content? Can I take it? Can I steal it?

Are you happy? Feels good to take it from me, doesn't it? Ji-young could no longer even row the arms she had been thrashing with. Countless fragments of arms gripped hers, holding her down beneath the jade-tinged blood-water and accusing her. Many corpses pressed in around Ji-young, badgering her. The things-that-had-been-human that gripped her limbs and her waist drained the last sliver of breath from her lungs and poured their own green, putrefied blood into them in its place. I have not. taken. anything.

I held death within me long before any of you. I am bearing the burden in your place. And I have not yet. reclaimed all of my happiness. Trying to throw off every coercion and pretense of self-blame, Ji-young twisted her wrist and scattered the bracelet outward again. Every grip locked around her arms and legs was severed, and Ji-young's body began to take up a slow, dancing motion.

The Black Wire whipped fiercely, and a green spray rose around Ji-young, beginning to push back the countless layers of blood that had wrapped her body.