Chương 8: Power

I tried to steady my breathing as Brian and I waited at the bottom of the stairwell. Holding the Umbra in my sweaty hands, I peeked through the crack of the slightly open door, waiting for Selene to return from scouting the first floor. So far, the plan was working out well. After Selene had drilled me on basic gun safety, she had me practice reloading, aiming, and try some shooting stances. It had done wonders to help my hands stop shaking, but I still felt nervous even holding my gun.

After that, Selene had helped me develop a plan. Our only real option was to head to another shelter, and the mega shelter on the first floor was the shortest path and our best bet at safety because the fifth floor lacked one due to the shielding station's presence. Mega shelters had dedicated personnel staffing them as they were expected to not only house residents of whatever building they were in but also people who came in from the street.

In other words, the chance of the emergency shield being active was much lower with professional handlers in charge. Unless, of course, they had an actual reason to activate it. After Selene and I had figured out the plan, convincing Brian was surprisingly easy. The second he saw the gun I'd "found" in the camera room, he'd been all wide-eyed and excited instead of scared. I supposed that from his perspective I had already taken down one with just an ice ax, and now I had a gun, making things even less scary.

Even after we'd stepped out from the security room, he'd only gotten a little nervous. We'd made a quick stop in front of the shelter for me to mime our plan to the security camera. Selene informed me that when the emergency shield activated, audio was cut as some high level Anathema could use sound attacks. I kept my pistol in my backpack while Selene kept a lookout because I did not want to have Lily and whoever may be watching asking questions. I also made sure to let Lily know that I didn't blame her.

The initial sense of betrayal I'd felt had quickly melted into guilt and worry that sat heavy at the bottom of my stomach. Lily wouldn't have just let somebody activate the shield, I knew better than that. No, chances were somebody took it into their own hands and hadn't given her a choice. I just hoped she was okay and hadn't done anything stupid in retaliation. It wasn't worth her getting hurt… not for me, anyway. [The path so far is clear,] Selene said, suddenly appearing in the hallway.

I nodded, letting my thoughts drift away from Lily as I looked back at Brian. He was looking shaky, and so I gave him a quick smile that he returned. My free hand went to my blazer pockets, reassuring myself that the spare magazines for my gun were secure on either side. After a deep breath to steady myself, I opened the door and motioned for him to follow as I went into the hallway. The first floor's architecture was much more like a standard, modern mall, all glass storefronts and white tile flooring.

As for the layout, it was much like the third floor's with a giant circular area in the center and a maze of hallways surrounding it. There was also a wide path leading from the center area directly to the front entrance, giving anybody who might come off the streets a straight shot to the shelter entrance in the middle. I scanned the area, keeping my gun pointed slightly down at the floor as I searched for movement. Between all the signs, reflections, advertisements, and glass, it was hard to see anything.

The dim red emergency lighting wasn't helping either. I moved to follow Selene as she scampered down the hall and took a turn. My movement was slower, and I checked through the windows of every store before passing, just to make sure Selene hadn't missed anything being extra stealthy. We continued like that, Brian following five paces behind me while Selene searched ahead. It was slow and painfully tense. I found myself jumping a few times at my own reflections moving in the windows.

It was a constant effort to relax my hands from the death grip they kept forming around my gun. The worst part was the noise. The mall was utterly silent except for our footsteps and breathing. It made my heartbeat feel extra loud in my ears. Every step that squeaked on the tile floors made me wince. We turned corner after corner until Selene finally stopped in front of me. [One Anathema up ahead, another Fomorian Hound. Defeating it would be a good chance to familiarize yourself with your gun.] I hesitated for a second, fear clawing up the back of my throat. Images of the monster's carapace body and lamprey mouth latching onto my stomach made me shudder, my breaths picking up in speed.

"Are you sure?" I thought to her.

"The noise and… I don't like taking risks, especially not with Brian here." [Between the lesser rune of silencing on your weapon and the mall's construction, noise will not be a problem. It would be more of a risk for you not to take this opportunity to use your gun for the first time. Unfamiliarity in an actual fight could be deadly.] I thought it over for a second, glancing back at Brian. It felt like there were so many things that could go wrong.

Something deep in me screamed that this was a bad idea, to just tell Selene to find another path, but… I was a Magical Girl now. I had a gun, and that voice inside was fear, something I'd told myself to always listen to but never let command me.

"Alright," I sent, and Selene hopped forward to the end of our current hall, waiting at the corner. I turned to Brian.

"Okay, I need you to wait right here for a moment," I whispered.

"I'm going to go take care of a monster quick. It might be loud, but don't panic. If I say run, go and hide, okay?" He looked at me with big eyes, and for a second I thought he was going to argue. Instead, he just clutched his action figure tighter to his chest and gave me a serious nod. I was a little surprised at that, but decided to roll with it and move after Selene to the next intersection, pressing myself against the corner and peeking around it.

I saw nothing, but shadows shifted on the glass of one of the storefronts. [Third store on the right. It should come out any moment now. Aim for center mass.] My throat was dry, but I followed Selene's instructions, aiming down the Umbra's sights at the store's entrance. The outer circle of the targeting reticle shrunk considerably in my vision as I took a proper aiming stance. My heart drummed in my ears, and I tried to slow down my breathing.

I double checked to make sure the safety was off and the hammer pulled back. My hands were sweaty, and I readjusted my grip. Then I carefully put my finger on the trigger and waited. After a few moments, there was more movement on the glass reflections. My breath hitched as the creature's head exited the store, and I forced myself not to pull the trigger in response. Its lidless eyes seemed unfocused as it continued stepping out, completely unaware of me. Slowly, it placed one foot in front of the other.

As it began exiting, I aimed for the center of its body. The creature was almost perpendicular in relation to me, giving me the biggest target I could ask for. The reticle changed from black to a glowing red as it passed over the Anathema. On my HUD, the outer circle of the reticle that predicted where the bullet could hit was small enough to be completely within the Anathema's body, theoretically guaranteeing a hit. I let out my breath, focusing on my aim and nothing else.

For a brief moment, fear flashed through me. What if I missed? What if it moved at the last second? What if I made a mistake like I always do? Then it would come for me with claws and its lamprey mouth and when it finished sucking the life from me… Stolen story; please report. Then it would go for Brian. I pulled the trigger. The gun barked about as loud as a plate breaking, the recoil jerking against my grip, but not nearly as much as I had anticipated.

I felt myself jump in surprise even though I was expecting it, but I forced myself to continue. My targeting reticle expanded briefly, and I adjusted it back onto the monster's body, pulling the trigger again and again. There was nothing else but the jolt of the gun in my hands and bright flashes of light that briefly interrupted my view as I opened fire, constantly recentering my aim in the brief moments between shots.

I fired as fast as I could and only stopped after I'd emptied eight rounds into the thing, a ding resounding in my head. [Defeated (Fomorian Hound - Level 3)] [Reward: 10 Points] I stared at the unmoving body of the Anathema, wisps of smoke trailing from the Umbra's muzzle. It was sprawled out in front of the store, not even a step from where I'd initially begun firing at it. Black liquid slowly began spreading beneath it. [Well, that went fairly well,] Selene's voice came to me cheerfully.

[I will scout around us to make sure nothing was heard. Then we can go over your performance.] Selene blurred from next to me and disappeared. I kept staring at the body of the Anathema, not daring to breathe as I looked at it. My hands shook slightly, and I carefully removed my finger from the trigger as I tried to process what had just happened. It… it was an Anathema. A nightmarish monster that humanity feared, that had ripped into my guts the first time I fought it, that had left me dying, and…

And I killed it so quickly it hadn't even had time to react. Something giddy and slightly hysterical bubbled up inside of me, and I choked back a laugh as I looked on with unbelieving eyes. I could feel my whole body begin to shake, and so I lowered the gun, stepping back behind the corner as I leaned against the wall for support. My breaths started to come out too quickly as I began to hyperventilate, my heart racing in the aftermath.

Inside me, it felt like all the fear, anxiety, and helplessness had snapped all at once, rolling through me in quivering waves. It hadn't even been an hour since the alarms first went off, and yet it felt like an eternity. All the hiding, the worrying, the planning… knowing that if I made one mistake, a child was likely going to die because of it. My life or death fight against an Anathema, the overwhelmingly raw violence and pain… Making a plan only to see safety sealed away from me… The fear, the constant fear…

The sheer helplessness … And now this, killing an Anathema in several seconds with just a few pulls on a trigger. I let out a shuddering breath and wiped at my suddenly wet eyes. It felt like a dam had broken, that all the worrying and tension had just been released. Even though I still felt it in me, it didn't feel like a steel wire wrapped around my heart anymore. It felt like I could breathe again. [Are you alright?] Selene asked, appearing next to me.

"Mm," I choked out through a sniff.

"Sorry, I just… it was so easy. I almost died the first time and now… I guess it's really just starting to hit me now. I'm a Magical Girl. I can fight them. I can do this. It's just a little… overwhelming." Selene tilted her head, watching me for a moment while I regained control of my breaths. [I understand,] she finally said. [The only advice I can really offer you is to remember this feeling. You are no longer helpless in the face of the eldritch, no longer condemned to watch. You have power now, Mai Kuroki. Power to fight and to protect, to change this world and leave it safer. It will not always be this easy, this painless, but try to embrace this new realization of what you are capable of. You are a Magical Girl now, and you are not powerless anymore.] I took a hitching breath and nodded as I let the emotions fade. While I did, I made sure to hit the magazine release on the Umbra's trigger guard, swapping out for a full magazine from my pockets.

The movement was a little jerky, but thanks to Selene's training, I managed to slot in the new magazine without too much effort. Forcing myself away from the wall, I looked back to see Brian still waiting further back down the hallway, hiding behind a potted plant. He was looking at me with big eyes, slightly crouched down like he was ready to run. I gave him a thumbs up and gestured for him to come closer, which he did quickly.

"Did you beat it?" he quickly asked in a loud whisper. I gave him a soft smile and nodded, and his jaw dropped. I could see the excitement building up in him, so I quickly placed a finger over my mouth in a shushing gesture.

"W-we have to be quiet and keep moving, just like before," I whispered back in a stutter, still trying to recompose myself.

"That way they won't notice us, right?" He nodded quickly, but there was still a gleam in his eyes as he looked at me. I turned away, found Selene waiting for me, and then we began moving again. We passed through the hallway with the Anathema, and I glanced at it as we passed. The big alien hound had a small pool of black blood forming underneath it, but was utterly unmoving.

It's lidless eyes stared at me like it could come alive at any moment, and I didn't quite let it out of my sight until we went into the next hallway. [Now, onto your combat performance. I would say that you did rather well, especially considering your inexperience. Your second hit would probably have killed the creature from blood loss and catastrophic damage, but the third ended its life. You missed your fourth and seventh shots as it was falling. It also appeared to me that you tunnel visioned too much on the reticule and firing. You need to keep your eyes open on the whole picture, watching your target's movements and the area around you.] I winced. 75% accuracy against a non-moving target from only a few storefronts away with all my advantages felt… pretty bad. Sure it was my first time actually firing a gun, but I still felt like I should have done better. Not to mention, Selene was right about me completely zoning out and while I pulled the trigger.

If I had been paying more attention, I wouldn't have wasted the next five bullets shooting at its falling corpse. [As for your shooting stance and grip… I am not an expert and hesitate to comment too deeply. You did seem to jerk the gun slightly on each trigger pull, but I would chalk that up to being unfamiliar and slightly apprehensive of shooting for the first time. In all, an excellent showing for your first time shooting a gun. Congratulations.] I squirmed slightly at the praise, unsure if I completely agreed.

"Thanks… but that was about as ideal as it was going to get. And… how did it only take three bullets to kill one of those things? I killed it without it even noticing me or having a chance to fight back. Are guns just… overpowered?" [No. There are a few factors. First, the Fomorian Hound was low level. Even then, it is a skirmishing type Anathema meant to scout and strike light targets. Combat focused ones will be significantly tougher. Secondly, while guns let you attack from a range with significant power, you are also spending points on ammunition, something a melee or magic user would not have to do. Third, you have to manage your ammo and reload in combat. Fourth, ranged weapons are much harder to aim and hit with than melee ones. Finally, in close combat, ranged weapons will be significantly harder to wield.] I nodded. I guess that made sense, but it was still hard to imagine myself having a sword and taking one down just as easily.

Maybe I was just being biased. A sneak attack wasn't really a good way to measure things anyway. Selene continued leading us through the mall, but something felt off. Instead of heading right to the center, it felt like we were continually doubling back, skirting around our destination. Sure, the mall was ridiculously big and practically a miniature city, but I still felt like it was taking much longer than it should have.

We turned a few more corners before stopping near what looked like another security office where Selene was waiting for us. Her ears twitched a few times before she sighed. [We have a problem, one that I don't see a good solution to.] I tilted my head at her slightly, and she seemed to consider her words carefully. [The central area leading to the shelter entrance is crawling with Anathema. I've been searching to see if there was a way to sneak past them, but have been unable to find one. Even worse, the Anathema seem to be stepping up their patrols, blocking off the paths to the other shelters. I'm afraid the only way forward is if you take on the Anathema guarding the first floor entrance directly.] I swallowed down the fear but gave a hesitant nod. I'd taken down one already, and it would only get easier. If this is what needed to be done to get to safety, then so be it.

"Okay. How many are there?" Selene's red eyes gleamed in the dim light as she looked at me. [Fourteen. You will have to face fourteen Anathema by yourself.]