Chương 72: Hidden Heartbreak

POV: The Dark Lord, Milo Miles Since I'd been left alone in the living room, and I didn't have a room of my own, I stretched out on the rug. The place was oddly quiet, just the crackle of the fireplace and the muffled hiss of the shower where the elf still was. Things seemed to be going well so far. Evelisse had not been branded as a traitor yet, and in a day or two, my terror level should increase quite a bit after Astrea made the announcement of the Hero's loss.

Still, I couldn't shake the feeling that things were going too well. Ywain was nowhere to be found, and that gnawed at me. He could resurface at any moment, and the second he did, everything might tip sideways. What I really wanted was some idea of what he was doing. Lulu would know. Maybe Greg could dig something up for us, if that was even allowed. Actually, why wouldn't it be? Lulu fed Ywain information all the time, interfered in the world through the Lord Luminaryn account whenever she pleased.

Surely Nyx could just mental-link Greg and have him leak something. Or, maybe I could link Greg myself? I supposed it's worth a shot. I sat on the rug and tried to picture him: the bald head, the pale blue eyes. I focused, reaching out with my mind, trying to catch the thread of a link to him. Nothing. Distance, maybe. Or the fact that we were in different worlds entirely. I bore down harder, concentrating until I could feel my head start to tremble with the effort— Still nothing. The link wouldn't connect.

"What are you doing? Shitting on the rug?" I turned. Nyx was already behind me, settled into a chair by the dining table, one elbow on the surface and her cheek resting against her palm.

"I was trying to mental-link Greg," I said.

"It didn't work." She lifted her head and gave a lazy, dismissive wave.

"Obviously it didn't. I'm the only one who can link him from this world. And even then, it's not like he answers every time."

"Have you talked to him yet? About how much I'm allowed to tell Evelisse and the others? The Afterport stuff?"

"Yes. That's exactly what I just did." She examined her nails.

"While you were off having your sappy, cringeworthy little moments with your beloved Evelisse. And the elf girl too, apparently."

"I didn't do any of that. In fact, I have repaired our image with the elf. Now she's willing to help us."

"Sure, by making yourself her personal provider. She'll order you around like a dog now." I wanted to say I wouldn't be reduced to that, and that having the elf see us favorably made everything easier for everyone, but arguing with Nyx was a losing game, so I let it drop.

"So... what did Greg say?" Nyx's eyes flicked toward the bathroom. The shower was still running, and under it I could just make out a faint humming, some tune I didn't recognize, drifting through the bathroom door; seemed like the elf was very pleased with the shower, which I found amusing.

"We should go outside," Nyx said. Outside, Luke was napping in her Cerberus form, and Astra, Evelisse's horse, had wandered around to the other side of her, grazing at the grass. I had no idea whether whatever she was eating was actually safe for a horse, but she seemed content enough chewing it, so I figured it must be fine.

"It's okay to tell them most things," Nyx said. That caught me off guard. So, it was fine to tell them about the Afterport? That their entire world was a kind of workspace for the so-called higher beings running it? That their god, Lord Luminaryn, was really just a shared account?

"Define most."

"You can tell them there's a higher power involved. That Lord Luminaryn is actually someone else, someone from another realm. The heavens, the other side, whatever you want to call it." Nyx crossed her arms.

"And that there are multiple gods up there, not just Lord Luminaryn." That made sense. So I could tell them Lord Luminaryn had been backing Ywain, the Hero, which wouldn't raise any eyebrows at all. No need to drag Lulu into it specifically; that would only complicate things. Though it'd probably be safe to mention Greg was one of the gods too.

"You can also tell them you came from another world," Nyx added.

"Summoned, reborn, whatever it was."

"Wait, really?"

"Greg ruled there's no harm in it. Once they know there are multiple gods, it's a small step to them knowing there are multiple worlds."

"But you said there was a risk of, what, mass hysteria?"

"Only if the information gets out, and realistically, those three aren't going to go blabbing it to anyone." Fair point. Who would Evelisse or Lunessa even tell? The only real risk was Mel, but I trusted Evelisse to keep her calm if it came to that.

"Besides," Nyx went on, "the biggest danger was always the world's balance going to pieces, which would've put Lycora itself in jeopardy. But nobody's minding the balance anymore, so even if a panic broke out, the world would hold together fine."

"I see." I turned it over.

"So if those two big things are cleared, then I'm guessing the smaller stuff, the Dark Lord skills, the system, that's all fine too?" If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.

"Sure, the system stuff's fine."

"Also, do you think we could have Greg dig up something on Lulu? Just so we can get ahead of whatever Ywain's planning next?"

"I can ask, but don't expect much." Nyx shook her head.

"Lulu's too well-shielded for him to turn up anything useful. Especially now that Lycora's off the Afterport's radar almost entirely, aside from the blessing overuse, no one up there's watching this place." Well. Damn.

"Then what about a little extra help from Greg directly? He sent Luke over that one time."

"Not happening. Greg's under even heavier scrutiny than Lulu. She's got privilege, he doesn't, and it's because he pulled that stunt once that he can't risk doing it again. Too dangerous for him." So Greg was essentially useless from here on out. Great. Whatever.

"Fine, so how do you suggest we break all this to the girls? Over dinner?"

"Up to you. I don't really care." Nyx turned and started toward the door. I mulled it over. Maybe I shouldn't do it as some big team meeting. Maybe I should tell Evelisse first to see how she took it, and let her decide how to bring the others in. She was the one who had the highest urgency to know, anyway. She had made that clear enough yesterday. Nyx pulled the door open, and for some reason, she just... stopped. Stood there in the doorway, her back to me, not going in.

Something about it made me feel like I ought to do something. Before she stepped inside. Not that anything would happen if she did. It'd be wasting hours away before dinner, and she'd eat the way she always did, unbothered, tossing the odd barbed remark my way across the table. Nothing would go wrong. I just had the feeling that a moment like this one, the two of us, alone, quiet, wouldn't come around easily again. Her shoulders rose and fell. A sigh, probably. Then she lifted her foot to step inside—"Nyx."

She went still. A good three seconds of it. Then she turned back around. She looked the same, and somehow not. The same irritation, the same sharp eyes, no trace of a smile, and yet there was something else in it, underneath, that I couldn't put a name to. What was I even going to say?

"Can you tell me about you?" The words came out before I'd decided on them.

"The stuff you did not answer previously when I asked you about them." The moment they were out, I wanted them back. It was awkward, out of nowhere, and, from any normal angle, creepy. Nyx had told me plainly, only days ago, that she didn't want to talk about any of it. I had no reason to think she'd changed her mind. I knew that, yet I'd asked anyway, somehow. Something flickered across her face. She drew in a slow breath.

"No." Then she turned, stepped inside, and shut the door behind her. I stood there for what felt like a long while afterward. It's been minutes and I felt like I had been rejected twice today. POV: The Assistant, Nyx As I shut the door, leaving Milo out in the clearing, I felt the sudden urge to glance at the window, to see what he was doing out there. I didn't do it.

I turned to head for my room, and the bathroom door opened, and the overbearing, bratty elf stepped out, towel draped around her shoulders, hair down and loose, dressed in the white shirt and blue shorts I could only assume the sister had handed her. That combination was becoming the unofficial uniform of this place. She'd handed me two sets as well. The elf startled and froze where she stood. I braced for her to snap at me, saying things like scram, stop looking at me, but she just...

stood there, her face faintly flushed. Whether from the warm shower or from being caught in something so plain and casual, I couldn't tell. Though, I admit she looked decent, cleaned up. By Milo's standards, she'd be pretty, which, thank goodness he wasn't around to see it. The last thing I needed was him gawping at a girl fresh out of the bath. An elf, no less. I moved to walk past her toward my room. And then—"Um," A small, uncertain sound. Like she wanted to call after me but couldn't settle on what to call me.

I stopped, and turned, wearing what was probably a fairly annoyed expression.

"What?"

"T-t-thank you…f-for letting me use the bath." She stumbled over it, then pulled the towel up to cover the lower half of her face, which was going redder by the second. If Milo had witnessed this, he'd have been squealing on the inside. For my part, I couldn't have cared less. Still, it was a marked shift from the creature who'd been hurling insults at us an hour ago. Whatever it was Milo had done, it had worked.

"Thank Milo for that," I said, and walked off to my room without waiting for a reply. I leaned back against the closed door, and a sigh slipped out of me before I'd noticed it forming. We were nowhere near safe. Ywain and Lulu were still out there, still intent on killing us, yet in under a month, Milo had done things I'd never have predicted. He'd gotten the former Hero to stand at his side. Then her friend, and, through some absurd, miraculous stroke of coincidence, her sister too.

Judging by how the elf had just looked at me, it was only a matter of time before she found some reason to take his side as well. He collected people like a video-game protagonist stumbling into party members, one improbably convenient encounter after another. Which should have been flatly impossible, given how awkward and hopeless and perverted he was, but he'd done it. Somehow. Some way. I found myself thinking that things might actually turn out fine. And they had to.

I refused to let us fail, to be killed, especially by that selfish, preening woman and her plaything. But… I looked at the room around me, and imagined the house full of people who had, one by one, chosen him, and— I don't think I'm all that necessary anymore.

"Why didn't you leave? When Greg offered you the way out." His stupid voice, from days ago, surfacing again in my head.

"I wish I knew the answer to that myself, dummy," I murmured to no one. The floorboards were closer than they should have been. At some point, without noticing, I'd slid down the door and come to rest sitting on the floor.

"Can you tell me about you?" His voice again. So what if I told him? He wouldn't feel a thing. He isn't that person anymore. Now he's ringed by pretty girls, and no doubt thrilled about it, being the pervert he is. I'm not expecting him to— … to come back. Which was a lie, and I knew it was a lie. It was why I'd stood frozen in that doorway after our brief, half-formal little exchange, unable to make myself step inside. Was this what we were now? Cold, transactional words with a bit of bickering laid over the top?

We'd talk like this a handful more times, and then, once all of it was finished, he'd simply drift away, off with Evelisse, doing whatever it is lovebirds do. And what would become of me after that? I could have stopped it. He was right there. A few meters away, on the other side of the walls. I could have walked out and told him everything, but the other half of me wouldn't allow it. It's meaningless. You'd only hurt yourself. And worse, you'd hurt him. Stop being selfish.

You were selfish once already, and look what it did to the both of you. The pain started up again; that prickling, crawling thing, deep in my chest, turning over and over on itself, each shift of it forcing the air out of me harder than I wanted to let it. I fisted a hand in the fabric over my chest and clenched my teeth. Stop. Stop. Stop. Then the warmth. Wet, rising, past anything I could hold back, climbing to my eyes. I shut them.

A few slipped through the seams anyway and dropped, one after another, onto the floorboards. Goddamn it.