Chương 101: Chapter 94: The Old Woman in a Shoe

The freezing, turbulent waters of the Argus coastline violently churned as a mechanical titan tore through the waves. The Atlesian Colossus was a terrifying monument to military engineering. It was a massive, bipedal machine towering hundreds of feet into the air, its chassis forged from thick, gunmetal gray armor plating with striking, faded red and orange accents along its joints. Its legs were colossal, pillar-like cylinders designed to withstand the crushing depths of the ocean.

The broad, bulky torso featured a wide, horizontal slit visor protecting the cockpit, completely enclosed by reinforced glass and steel. Most intimidating of all was its weaponry: a gargantuan, multi-barreled rotary Dust cannon was mounted securely to its right arm, while its left arm ended in a massive, fully articulated mechanical fist designed to pulverize Leviathan-class Grimm. From inside the cockpit, Special Operative Caroline Cordovin practically vibrated with patriotic fury.

She slammed the heavy control levers forward, driving the colossal machine through the icy bay toward the stolen Manta airship.

"Clearly the people have forgotten that they live in peace thanks to the awesome might of Atlas!" Cordovin's voice boomed through the mech's external acoustic projectors, the sheer volume rattling the windows of the distant coastal homes. Inside the stolen Manta 5-1, Weiss Schnee clung to the copilot's console, staring out the windshield in absolute, paralyzed shock.

"Is Cordovin... piloting that?"

"Consider this a reminder!" Cordovin roared. The Colossus raised its massive right arm. The multi-barreled cannon began to spin with a high-pitched, mechanical whine. A blinding, crackling orb of yellow electricity gathered at the muzzle. With a thunderous boom, Cordovin fired a devastating electric burst directly at the fleeing airship. The EMP blast grazed the hull of the Manta.

The entire cabin was violently flooded with sparks, and the primary control panels flashed red as system errors cascaded across the screens. Maria Calavera gripped the yoke, her cybernetic eyes spinning wildly in their sockets as they struggled to recalibrate the scrambled sensor data.

"Are you okay?" Weiss yelled over the blaring klaxons, grabbing her seat harness.

"I am, but she's clearly lost her mind!" Maria shouted back, wrestling the heavy controls to keep the ship from nosediving into the ocean.

"And that was merely a warning shot!" Cordovin sneered, her massive voice echoing across the bay.

"All Atlas personnel standby, and watch how your leader maintains order!" On the snowy precipice of the coastal cliffs, Ruby Rose gripped the shaft of Crescent Rose, her silver eyes narrowed against the freezing sea spray. Beside her, Qrow Branwen, Jaune Arc, Pyrrha Nikos, Lie Ren, Nora Valkyrie, and Oscar Pine stood frozen, watching the stolen airship spiral erratically with the mountainous Colossus trudging closely behind it.

"Hurry back, Weiss!" Ruby spoke sharply into her earpiece.

"I need you on the ground if we're gonna take this thing down!"

"You're joking, right?" Weiss gasped over the radio, the sound of blaring alarms bleeding through the transmission.

"You want to fight this thing?!"

"We've fought giant monsters before," Ruby stated, a fierce, confident grin spreading across her face.

"This is just a tiny old lady... with one very big robot."

"Well, after spending weeks desperately trying to land a single scratch on an invincible bald guy, a giant, clunky robot feels like a massive step down! At least this thing actually has a measurable center of gravity," Nora added while grinning in excitement. Inside the colossal mech, Cordovin's patience entirely spent.

"You little spider-roaches thought you could creep your way to Atlas?! Well, let's see how your resolve holds out against the might of the Atlesian Military!" Cordovin flipped a heavy switch on her console. A specialized slot on the top of the mech's arm cannon slid open. A sleek, high-yield tracking missile popped out and fired, leaving a thick trail of white smoke as it locked directly onto the Manta airship's heat signature. Ruby didn't hesitate.

She threw Crescent Rose to her shoulder, peering through the sniper scope. Utilizing the microscopic visual tracking she had honed trying to follow Saitama's afterimages, she calculated the wind resistance and the missile's velocity in a fraction of a millisecond. She pulled the trigger. The high-caliber sniper round tore across the bay. The bullet struck the tracking missile perfectly, detonating it harmlessly in a massive fireball just a few dozen yards behind the airship.

Inside the cockpit, Cordovin watched the explosion on her monitors. She slowly turned the Colossus's massive torso, the optical slit visor locking onto the tiny, red-hooded girl standing defiantly on the cliff. Ruby lowered her weapon, glaring back at the towering machine while the rest of her team drew their weapons and stepped up beside her.

"SO BE IT!!" Cordovin growled in absolute, unadulterated fury. Cordovin aggressively pulled the targeting yoke, aiming the main cannon directly at Ruby and the Vanguard. Inside the struggling airship, Weiss and Maria saw the massive barrels aligning toward their friends.

"Dive!" Weiss ordered. Weiss unbuckled her seatbelt and bolted from her seat, while Maria aggressively shoved the yoke forward, sending the Manta into a steep, plummeting dive toward the snowy landing zone. As Maria leveled the ship out just above the ground, Weiss kicked the side door open with Myrtenaster in her hand. The moment the ship swept low over the cliffs, Weiss jumped off. She landed gracefully in the snow, immediately raising her rapier. Her Aura flared, channeling Earth Dust into the ground.

A massive, thick rock wall erupted from the cliffside, perfectly shielding the group just as Cordovin unleashed a devastating barrage of Ice Dust. The freezing blast battered against the stone wall, encasing it in thick layers of frost, but leaving the Huntsmen completely unharmed.

"That was close," Oscar breathed, clutching his cane as the ice settled.

"We need to figure out how to stop Cordovin and protect the airship until we do," Ruby said, her tactical mind racing as the group huddled behind the rock barrier. Jaune stepped forward, looking around the barrier at the colossal machine wading through the bay.

"Let's give her more targets to focus on."

"You mean us, don't you?" Nora grinned, cracking her knuckles with a wild spark in her teal eyes.

"Look at that thing," Jaune reasoned, pointing with his sword.

"It's not designed for small enemies. It's probably meant for giant Grimm that come in from deeper waters. We can turn our size into an advantage. We just have to be smart."

"Jaune is absolutely right," Pyrrha chimed in, her green eyes sharp and focused as she readied her shield, Akoúo̱.

"Her tracking sensors will struggle against multiple, high-speed targets. Our evasion training with Saitama pushed our reaction times far beyond what a machine of that size can track. If we scatter, she won't be able to lock onto all of us at once."

"That's right," Ruby nodded firmly.

"And this one is much lesser compared to the giant robot back in Mistral!"

"That was just an illusion, though," Jaune added. Ruby then tapped her earpiece.

"Maria, can you keep the ship out of harm's way?"

"They can take my driver's license," Maria's raspy voice crackled over the comms,"but I won't let them take this ship!"

"Very reassuring..." Ren noted deadpan, his StormFlower pistols clicking as he checked his magazines.

"I'll be more useful if I go with her," Oscar offered, turning toward the hovering Manta.

"From up high, I can try to spot a weakness."

"Well, he's not the only one who can grab a bird's eye view," Qrow smiled, stepping forward and stretching his arms. Weiss turned to Ruby, brushing a speck of frost from her dress.

"You said you needed me on the ground?"

"Not exactly," Ruby replied, offering a nervous, highly apologetic smile.

"Did we miss the party?!" A loud, boisterous voice yelled over the roar of the ocean. The group turned to see a bright, pastel-yellow tourist scooter skidding to a violent halt on the snowy cliffside. Yang Xiao Long and Blake Belladonna leaped off, abandoning the ridiculous vehicle as they drew their weapons and seamlessly integrated into the formation.

"What in the hell is that giant mech?!" Yang's eyes widened.

"We disabled the radar," Blake announced, her amber eyes locking onto the towering mech.

"How did she caught us?" Weiss sighed, lowering her shoulders.

"That was on me." As the team rapidly strategized, Cordovin kept a keen, furious eye on the rock wall from her cockpit. Suddenly, her eyes widened in sheer frustration as the group burst from behind their cover, splitting into three rapid, highly coordinated vectors. Team JNPR, Yang, and Blake ran down the left path along the rocky beach. Maria flew the airship sharply to the right, carrying Oscar. Ruby and Qrow flew straight up into the air using her Semblance and his corvid form, respectively.

Ruby reformed from her flurry of rose petals high above the bay, utilizing her momentum to fire a heavy, armor-piercing round from Crescent Rose. The bullet struck the mech's reinforced windshield, leaving a visible, spider-webbing crack across the glass. Cordovin growled in frustration. She slammed her hand onto the weapons console, firing a massive volley of tracking missiles directly toward Ruby's location. Ruby landed lightly on a high pine tree branch. The whistling of the incoming projectiles filled the air.

Just like dodging the broom. Ruby thought, her breathing steadying as the world seemed to slow down. She used her Semblance, bursting into petals to dodge the missiles with sub-atomic precision. She reformed mid-air, sprinting and jumping flawlessly along the very casings of the missiles as they flew past her, before freefalling down toward the churning ocean. An incoming tidal wave rose up to swallow her, but it was instantly frozen solid by a pale blue glyph cast by Weiss from below.

Ruby hit the ice, sliding effortlessly along the ramp.

"Let's go!" Ruby cheered. Weiss also slid off the frozen wave, using Myrtenaster to rapidly freeze small patches of ice, creating a jagged, floating bridge for her and Ruby to leap across toward the mech. As Cordovin furiously kept her attention on the two girls dancing across the ice, her mech was suddenly struck by a booming volley of pink, explosive grenades against its left leg.

"Hey! Over here!" Jaune yelled, waving his heavy shield from the shoreline.

"What?!" Cordovin snapped, violently jerking the mech's sensors toward the beach. Cordovin looked over to Jaune's group as they kept running along the rocky shoreline, moving in a flawless, staggered formation that made them nearly impossible to track.

"And you said it wasn't beach season!" Nora laughed, winking at Ren as she reloaded her hammer. The ground team then took cover behind a series of massive coastal boulders. Nora fired off more grenades from Magnhild, but suddenly, a glowing, hexagonal shield pattern appeared in the air, completely protecting Cordovin's mech and absorbing the explosions without doing absolutely any damage to the chassis.

"Surely you knew Atlas was the father of hard-light Dust," Cordovin laughed, her voice booming with arrogant superiority over the external speakers.

"Or do lesser kingdoms simply lack proper education?" Cordovin charged up her mech's arm cannon again, this time firing a devastating barrage of Rock Dust that shattered the coastal boulders, forcing Jaune's team to abandon their cover and scatter across the snow.

"Cordo just activated shields!" Jaune reported over the comms, ducking a flying chunk of debris. If you come across this story on Amazon, it's taken without permission from the author. Report it.

"I saw that," Oscar replied from the airship, pressing his face against the glass window.

"We need to find whatever's generating it."

"You know, in video games, the weak spot's usually on the back of the giant boss!" Ruby suggested, sliding to a halt on an ice patch.

"Ruby, this isn't a game!" Weiss scolded sharply, maintaining her footing.

"I'm just trying to-- LOOK OUT!!" Ruby screamed. Cordovin's mech stomped violently at the patch of ocean where the girls stood, sending a massive geyser of freezing water into the air.

"You are ants!" Cordovin bellowed, her pride completely blinding her to her flanks.

"You are lower than ants!" Unbeknownst to Cordovin, Qrow had flown around the backside of the mech in his avian form. As he flew through the freezing clouds, he transformed back into his human form in mid-air and drew Harbinger's scythe form. He propelled himself forward, grappling securely onto the giant mech's shoulder armor.

"Ah! What was that?!" Cordovin gasped, feeling the tremor shake the cockpit.

"Until the shield's down, we're gonna have to get up close and personal with this thing," Qrow muttered to himself, balancing on the massive steel plates. Qrow started to fire his shotgun barrel directly at the scratch he had just made on the armor. Suddenly, the mech's giant, articulated mechanical hand swung upward, reaching over its own shoulder to swat him like an insect.

Qrow effortlessly dodged out of the way, transforming back into his avian form and diving toward the sea just as the metal fingers clamped shut on empty air.

"That's easier said than done!" Ren's voice buzzed through the comms.

"Weiss and I are on it!" Ruby replied. Ruby and Weiss landed on a large, stable patch of ice on the ocean together.

"Hold on!" Weiss warned. Weiss stabbed Myrtenaster deeply into the ice, channeling her Aura into a massive, concentrated Ice Dust attack that erupted directly beneath the Colossus's right foot, knocking Cordovin's mech completely off balance for a crucial second. Cordovin let out a frustrated, angry yell as the cockpit violently shuddered, her hands scrambling over the controls. As the airship flew by, Oscar analyzed the shifting plates of the staggering machine and realized something.

"Wait, that's it," Oscar breathed.

"When she--" Suddenly, Cordovin regained her balance and aimed her massive arm cannon directly at Ruby and Weiss.

"RUBY, MOVE!!" Oscar gasped in sheer panic over the radio. Cordovin fired a devastating volley of tracking missiles at Ruby and Weiss, creating a colossal plume of boiling water and steam that swallowed their position entirely. From the center of the explosion, Weiss and Ruby emerged completely unharmed, riding majestically on the back of Weiss's summoned Queen Lancer.

Ruby leaped off the spectral Grimm, using Crescent Rose's recoil to propel herself directly onto Cordovin's mech, embedding the scythe's heavy blade deep into the armor plating of the torso.

"Wooo! Atta girl!" Maria cheered Ruby on loudly from the cockpit of the Manta. The immense kinetic force of Ruby's strike knocked the towering mech back into the cliffside. The massive tremors echoed through the earth, shaking the foundations of the houses in Argus. Cordovin let out an enraged, hysterical scream.

"Go!!" Jaune commanded from the shore. Team JNPR, Yang, and Blake surged forward with blinding speed. Ren leaped gracefully onto the mech's lowered arm, running vertically along the steel plating while using the blades of StormFlower to hang on. Jaune used the heavy two-hander form of Crocea Mors to slash viciously at the mech's hip joint, while Nora used the hammer form of Magnhild to smash repeatedly at the casing of the arm cannon.

Pyrrha utilized her Polarity, magnetically gripping the massive steel joints of the Colossus's left leg to restrict the machine's fluid movements, acting as a massive, invisible anchor. Blake used her shadow clones to blind the mech's lower optical sensors, while Yang unleashed a barrage of explosive shotgun blasts to crack the armor plating on its shin.

Cordovin furiously managed to stand the mech back up, shaking off the attackers and causing Ruby to be lowered down directly into her view on the cracked windshield. Ruby hung onto the embedded blade of Crescent Rose, offering Cordovin a highly nervous, incredibly awkward smile and a small wave.

"Get off of me!" Cordovin shrieked. Cordovin tried to grab Ruby with the mech's articulated left hand, forcing Ruby to let go of her scythe as she used her Semblance to fly rapidly downward. Luckily, Weiss flew by on her Queen Lancer summon, catching Ruby flawlessly mid-air.

"Heh," Ruby grinned, settling onto the summon.

"What if I hadn't caught you?" Weiss scolded, though her tone was light.

"I knew you would," Ruby grinned widely. Weiss just groaned, banking the Lancer away from the swinging mechanical fist. As they flew around the mech, Ren lowered himself down along the Colossus's broad, armored back. His keen eyes noticed a specific, recessed panel with a heavy, humming machine sound emanating from it. Ren used one of his blades to pry the thick steel panel off, but almost fell as the mech kept bucking violently.

Fortunately, Qrow appeared from the clouds, shifting back into his human form, and caught Ren's wrist firmly.

"Gotcha," Qrow grunted, hauling the young ninja up.

"What'd ya find?" Qrow tossed Ren back up, and both of them looked at the panel he had just opened. Inside, they saw a massive, whirring machine core with a stark, painted label: AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ONLY - SHIELD GENERATOR.

"Well, alright then," Qrow smirked. Qrow and Ren drew their weapons and opened fire, unloading their magazines directly into the delicate machinery, completely destroying the mech's shields in a shower of electrical sparks. Inside the cockpit, Cordovin watched her tactical screen as the hard-light shield integrity meters were instantly reduced to zero.

"No, no, no, no!!" Cordovin panicked, her hands flying across the console. Cordovin then felt a massive, concussive tremor as Nora fired a heavy volley of pink grenades directly at the cockpit glass.

"You get back here with my man!!!" Nora yelled. As Nora continued firing to keep Cordovin distracted, Weiss and Ruby flew the Queen Lancer by the back of the mech to pick up Ren and Qrow.

"Jump on!" Weiss ordered. The two men leaped from the sparking machinery, landing securely on the summon. Down below, Nora continued to fire until she heard the hollow click of an empty magazine. She had run out of ammo. Suddenly, Jaune noticed the massive shadow falling over them as Cordovin lifted up the mech's colossal, heavily armored left arm. Jaune ran desperately over to Nora, throwing himself in front of her alongside Pyrrha, Yang, and Blake, raising his shield.

"I've had enough of you ingrates!" Cordovin roared, her pride completely shattered and replaced by a violent desperation. Cordovin slammed the mech's massive arm directly into the clustered ground team. The sheer, overwhelming physical force of the giant machine knocked Jaune, Nora, Pyrrha, Yang, and Blake violently backward, instantly breaking their Auras with a bright, shattering flash of light. The five Huntsmen and Huntresses crashed heavily into the snowy embankment, struggling weakly to get back up.

"No!!" Ren yelled from the sky, his eyes wide with horror. Suddenly, Weiss gasped. Cordovin pivoted the mech with terrifying speed, firing the main arm cannon directly at the Queen Lancer group at point-blank range. The blast completely destroyed the spectral summon, knocking Weiss, Ren, Qrow, and Ruby violently back through the air over to the jagged cliffside. Ruby desperately used her Semblance to fly back over to the safety of the cliff, but her Aura was depleted, and she fell short.

Plummeting toward the freezing ocean, Ruby violently embedded the blade of Crescent Rose into the icy cliffside, holding on for dear life as she dangled precariously over the abyss. She looked up, her silver eyes widening in terror as she noticed Cordovin's massive mech approaching her isolated position.

"This is what happens when you think you know better than those rightfully in charge!" Cordovin spat, aiming the massive cannon directly down at the defenseless, hanging girl. From the hovering airship, Oscar noticed Ruby in mortal danger. He ran frantically over to Maria's pilot seat.

"We gotta do something!" Oscar pleaded. Maria's cybernetic goggles whirred. She flicked several switches on the controls and banked the Manta airship, flying aggressively back over to the mech. Just as Cordovin was about to fire her arm cannon at Ruby, Maria flew by and fired a high-yield missile directly at the mech's arm to disrupt the shot. Suddenly, the Colossus moved with unexpected agility.

It raised its massive left hand and caught the incoming missile entirely in its metallic grip, crushing the projectile harmlessly. Cordovin turned the mech's towering torso around, her optical sensors locking onto Maria's airship.

"Calavera..." Cordovin growled, a dark, vengeful sneer on her lips. Everyone on the cliffside watched helplessly as Cordovin took aim and fired the crushed, volatile missile directly toward the airship's direction. The missile screamed through the air, exploding violently just in front of the Manta's windshield. The shockwave slammed into the cockpit, causing the entire airship to rattle and spin wildly out of control through the freezing sky.

The humid, chemically scented air of the Argus Express Cleaners was thick with the suffocating heat of a dozen industrial dryers running simultaneously. The rhythmic, hypnotic sloshing of soapy water echoed through the narrow aisles, accompanied by the low hum of fluorescent lights overhead. Sitting in a row of stiff, uncomfortable plastic waiting chairs was Saitama.

Currently stripped of his pristine white trench coat, he wore his tailored black suit and charcoal vest, though his sleeves were rolled up slightly to combat the muggy warmth of the laundromat. Resting securely on his head was Roman Torchwick's signature bowler hat, masking his shiny scalp from the half-dozen ordinary Argus citizens folding their clothes nearby. Saitama was slouched so far down in his chair that he was practically sliding off the plastic.

He glared at the heavy-duty washing machine spinning relentlessly in front of him, his dotted eyes narrowed in profound impatience.

"Two hours," Saitama grumbled, his voice a flat, nasal drone of absolute misery.

"Two hours for a 'premium deep-clean cycle.' I could have just scrubbed it in the sink with a bar of cheap soap." Sitting directly beside him, Neo casually crossed her legs. She was still maintaining her Overactive Imagination disguise, her vibrant hair masked by a dull, mundane brown, and her combat gear hidden beneath a beige winter coat. She didn't look remotely bothered by the wait. In fact, she looked incredibly content, happily licking a brightly colored Argus cherry lollipop.

Hearing Saitama's complaints, Neo reached into her pocket, pulled out her Scroll, and tapped the screen twice. She shoved the glowing glass into his line of sight. [Cheapskate.] Saitama's brow furrowed, a prominent vein throbbing on his temple as he swatted the Scroll away.

"I'm not being cheap, I'm being economically responsible!" Saitama argued defensively, crossing his arms.

"Do you have any idea how much those snacks you keep extorting from me cost? The inflation in this kingdom is ridiculous! If I don't watch my Lien, we'll be eating plain white rice for the next month!" Neo merely smirked around her lollipop, offering a careless, elegant shrug. Before Saitama could lecture her further on the nuances of budgeting, the linoleum floor beneath their boots suddenly vibrated. THUMP. It wasn't a subtle tremor.

The heavy, rhythmic vibration rattled the plastic chairs, shook the vending machine in the corner, and sent ripples cascading across the sudsy water inside the washing machines. THUMP. THUMP. THUMP. The few customers in the laundromat paused their folding. An older woman holding a basket of towels walked over to the large, frosted storefront window and wiped away the condensation to peer outside toward the coastline. The woman let out a bloodcurdling, high-pitched scream.

"M-Monster!! No, wait... it's a giant machine!!" The other customers crowded the window, their eyes widening in sheer, unadulterated terror. Rising high above the distant, snow-capped cliffs of the Argus bay, easily visible even from the commercial district, was the colossal, towering form of the Atlesian Colossus. The deafening, concussive BOOM of its massive rotary Dust cannon firing an EMP blast echoed across the city, shaking the very foundations of the buildings. Panic erupted instantly.

"We're under attack!" a man shrieked, dropping an entire basket of freshly folded shirts onto the dirty linoleum.

"Run! Get to the shelters!" The laundromat dissolved into absolute chaos. Customers scrambled over each other, abandoning their laundry entirely as they burst through the glass doors and flooded into the snowy streets, joining the screaming masses of Argus citizens fleeing the coastline. Amidst the stampede of terrified civilians, Saitama and Neo remained completely stationary in their plastic chairs.

"Earthquake? At this time? Geez..." Saitama didn't even look out the window. He just scowled deeply at the washing machine in front of him, highly annoyed that the violent tremors were making the machine rattle loudly against the floor tiles, threatening to unbalance the spin cycle. Neo sat perfectly still, lazily twirling the stick of her lollipop. She watched the panicked citizens trample each other with mild, amused indifference.

While the entire city believed an apocalyptic battle was unfolding on their doorstep, Neo felt absolutely no fear. She glanced sideways at the bald man slouching next to her. As long as she was sitting next to the invincible anomaly who treated reality like a mere suggestion, she knew she was the safest person on the entire continent. From the back room, two laundromat employees burst through the swinging doors, carrying their winter coats and looking absolutely frantic.

"Leave the registers! We have to evacuate!" the manager yelled, sprinting toward the front entrance. As they tried to rush past the waiting area, Saitama stood up, casually stepping directly into their path to block the aisle.

"Hey. Hold on a second," Saitama said, his voice entirely flat and devoid of any urgency.

"What about my coat? Are you guys gonna be here to unlock the door when it finishes?" The manager skidded to a halt, staring at the man in the black suit and bowler hat as if he had just grown a second head.

"Are you insane?!" the employee screamed, pointing a shaking finger toward the window where the Colossus was currently unleashing a volley of tracking missiles.

"There is a giant military mech destroying the coastline! The city is under martial lockdown! We have to run!"" It's dry-clean only," Saitama pointed out reasonably, gesturing a red-gloved thumb toward the tumbling suds.

"If it sits wet in the drum, it's going to get wrinkled." The employees didn't even have the mental capacity to process the sheer, mind-numbing absurdity of the complaint. With a synchronized shriek of terror, they shoved past Saitama and bolted out the front doors, fleeing into the snowy streets and leaving the laundromat completely abandoned. Saitama stood in the empty aisle, watching them run away. He let out a long, highly exasperated sigh, shaking his head.

"Unbelievable. The customer service in Atlas territories is terrible," Saitama grumbled, completely ignoring the distant explosions shaking the ceiling tiles. He shuffled back over to his industrial washing machine, crouching down slightly to peer through the thick, suds-covered glass door. He squinted his dotted eyes, watching the heavy white fabric of his trench coat tumble through the soapy water. A small, satisfied smile touched his lips.

"Oh, nice. The potato chip grease is actually coming out. I guess the premium cycle was worth it after all." Satisfied that his wardrobe was saved, Saitama reached into the inner pocket of his black suit vest, pulling out his incredibly thin, worn-out leather wallet. He opened it, wincing internally at the pathetic lack of Lien bills inside, intending to prepare exact change for the service counter. Ka-ching! The sharp, mechanical ring of a cash register popping open echoed from the front counter.

Saitama snapped his head up. Neo was standing behind the employee counter. She had seamlessly bypassed the electronic lock, the heavy cash drawer wide open in front of her. She was currently elbows-deep in the till, her gloved hands scooping up thick stacks of Lien notes with a wicked, opportunistic grin on her disguised face. In a literal blur of motion, Saitama crossed the laundromat. SMACK! Ow!

Neo let out a sharp, silent squeak of indignation, violently jerking her hand back as Saitama slapped her wrist with paternal strictness.

"What did I tell you about this back in Mistral?" Saitama scolded, pointing an accusing red glove directly at her nose. His face was drawn in an exaggerated, highly annoyed scowl.

"You can't just steal from the cash register just because the employees ran away screaming in terror. It's bad karma. Put it back." Neo rubbed her stinging wrist, pouting fiercely. She glared up at him, her heterochromic eyes flashing with defiance. She pulled out her Scroll with her free hand, typing rapidly with her thumb before shoving the screen toward his face. [You want it too. You're broke.] Saitama froze. A massive, comical bead of sweat formed on his temple as his eyes darted away guiltily. It was true.

Between feeding her insatiable sugar addiction and buying premium groceries, his heroic funds were dangerously low. The stacks of Lien in the open drawer were undeniably tempting.

"I-I do not!" Saitama protested loudly, his voice cracking with defensive panic as he waved his hands.

"I am an upstanding, employed security consultant! I don't need to loot abandoned laundromats!" Neo crossed her arms over her chest, puffing her cheeks out into a massive, indignant pout as she dramatically kicked the cash drawer shut with her boot.

"Good," Saitama muttered, turning his attention to his own wallet. He carefully pulled out a few meager Lien bills, counting them out with a heavy, tragic sigh before placing them neatly onto the front counter next to the register.

"Honesty is important," Saitama lectured the pouty illusionist, patting the money flat.

"If you do the right thing, good things happen to you." Beep-beep-beep! The cheerful, electronic chime of the washing machine echoed through the empty store, signaling the end of the premium cycle.

"Oh! It's done!" Saitama's face instantly lit up with pure joy, completely forgetting his lecture. He spun on his heel, practically skipping back down the aisle toward his machine, eager to retrieve his pristine white trench coat.

"Let's see how bright it looks!" The moment Saitama turned his back, Neo's pout instantly vanished. A sly, wickedly triumphant smile spread across her lips. With a fluid, completely silent sleight-of-hand maneuver, she reached out, swiped the exact Lien bills Saitama had just placed on the counter, and smoothly slipped them deep into the pocket of her beige coat.

She popped her lollipop back into her mouth, turning to follow the oblivious hero toward the dryers, perfectly content with her newly acquired, slightly unethical allowance.