Chương 33: Ads

The focus on the video between two superheroes was thankfully short-lived, as Jairo began pestering both Sam and May.

"Can you guys please help me figure out why my phone just isn't doing stuff right anymore? Like, look, I tap here..." As he trailed off, I looked towards him to see that he was in fact tapping on his phone.

"And that should go to YouTube, right? But it's taking forever!" The doctor rubbed her chin.

"And you're connected to the wireless internet down here?" Nodding, he slid his finger along the screen and pointed at something. I had no idea what he was doing.

"Yeah, see? It's got the wi-fi logo." Loud music. I think music. It sounded like two people arguing in another language over police sirens. Jairo quickly mashed away at the screen before the music stopped.

"Sorry," he croaked out, "But look how long it takes to make the video come up! And it's all crunchy looking!" Leaning forward, Sam flicked away at the phone idly.

"Huh. Shouldn't be doing that. Have you been downloading random games?"

"They're not random! I only download the ones with a bunch of ratings, and only if it's four stars or higher!" She sighed.

"You shouldn't be downloading any games at all. It's not the games themselves, but a lot of them make their money through advertisements, and those ads are what cause issues. And you were the one putting videos on the TV last time, too, right?" Looking like a cat that caught the canary, Jairo nodded, prompting a second and much more aggressive sigh from Dr. Way.

"Snickerdoodles. I bet that's why the TV wasn't working until I had to do a factory reset on it. I'm gonna have to monitor our networks now and see if whatever bug you got has spread. We're up to date on security and I'm pretty damn good at cryptography." There was frustration on her face, almost cartoonish in appearance, as she squinted at the phone.

"Can't be anything more than just unnecessary bloat. But I really don't like our systems having risks like that, Jairo." May spoke up afterwards.

"Do you want me to get started on clearing his phone out? I remember how to put the parental controls on from the last time you showed me." The doctor nodded, before pulling her own phone out of her pocket.

"I want you to do it for all of our phones. Chris, give May your phone too. May, head down to the lab and do a clean-up on everything. When you go in, head down, turn a left towards where the bathroom would be. When you're facing that wall, take another ten feet to the right next to the drill press. I've got a table with hardware used for backing up contact info and such. There's an instructional pamphlet with it, like with all my gear." I cocked my head.

"Do you leave instructions for everything?" She nodded.

"Just basic 'How to use' ones and a section for very very rudimentary maintenance for if I'm indisposed like for being sick or when I'm dealing with exams. I can't make you understand how it works, but if you know the right buttons for the basic stuff you can get by." Chris and Jairo joined Sam in handing off their phones to May, who hauled them off to the lab.

"And from here on you're not downloading anything on that phone I don't approve in advance. I still haven't figured out why your ear pieces don't work. I'm betting it's the parasite, but I can't exactly open your skull to look," she scolded, pointing at Jairo. The mohawked boy's posture sunk with some measure of embarrassment.

"You got it, doc," he croaked out, before trudging off towards his room in defeat. With a heavy sigh, Sam rubbed her face.

"I'm gonna get something to eat. You guys want anything?" Chris perked up.

"I wanna get something too. I'll go with." As the two left, I was left alone. I needed some way to keep the time, I didn't want to blank out like that again. Best odds of that were by avoiding hiding out. While I did blank out here last time, it was likely a slow introduction. Now that I was keeping an eye out, I might be more reactive to it. Something else would be needed to track time. Or some sort of sensation I couldn't ignore. Looking at the refrigerator, I realized it would be cold enough to keep me lucid.

Pulling a stool by it, I opened the fridge's door, and lingered by it as I used the opportunity to more actively track my thoughts. May was the biggest unknown. I needed to figure out her line. Jairo was juvenile enough in behavior that I could leave that in the air. May, however, seemed like she had her head on her shoulders. But she was still here, meaning there was a line she crossed at some point. Chris killed someone. Sam engaged in illegal experiments and played God.

I pissed off local government by crippling the wrong guy. What the Hell could May have done? The cold air on my skin vanished with a thudding noise. In front of me was Tancred, whose hand was on the refrigerator door.

"I get you don't have an electricity bill to pay, wise-ass, but that's tax dollars you're wasting. The place is climate controlled. And you're one of the two lucky ones with a window next to an underground river, you need cold, lean against that." Looking up at him, I never noticed his glasses had a very yellowish tint to the rims. Gold? Copper? I wasn't sure. They stood out compared to the blue lenses.

"Was just trying to keep myself alert while I was thinking."

"What, like you're not alert enough? Your head's on a swivel 25 hours a day, eight days a week." Internally, I debated mentioning the blank out. That seemed like an easy weakness to hold against me. Then again, I found none against him anyway. One more on me couldn't hurt while I didn't have any checkmates.

"You say that, but earlier today I completely zoned out for half the day. From early in the morning all the way to in the van, on the way to the rehearsal. I can't remember a second of it. No one commented on it." The agent's usual sneer vanished in favor of a more neutral look. Taking his hand off the door, it led to him crossing his arms.

"Just... what, lights on but nobody's home? Nothing?" I nodded.

"Huh. Any headaches or anything like that?" Not that I knew of. Shook my head to verify that.

"So probably not a brain tumor, but I'm not a doctor. I only qualify as a surgeon by the shit I do to people, but that doesn't count." Unauthorized duplication: this tale has been taken without consent. Report sightings. He stuck a foot out, yanking a stool over and practically falling into it without issue.

"You sure you're not just thinking about too much?" This was a dumb thing to do. But I literally had no idea how else to get answers.

"Sam told me about how her and Chris got offers for the New Sentinels. Chris killed someone. She made clones. Given how I got in, it's pretty clear we're all threats you're managing. I've been trying to figure out what would make May and Jairo eligible. Jairo I can guess, but May gives me nothing." Tancred continued to just watch me, his arms still crossed. I fucked up. I shouldn't have told him anything. He's gonna use that paranoia against me-"You know, that's a pretty reasonable concern.

I suppose it's fair that you think you're all here punitively. Yeah, your leader put someone in the morgue and your doctor did some fucked up stuff. And you're every disability insurance company's worst nightmare." That seemed too fair. Why was he being this rational? There had to be something he was gonna sneak into this. But what would that be? There hasn't been anything that actually came for free from this asshole, why now? Was it because I let my guard slip?

"I suppose you deserve some clearer understanding of why you're all here. Yes, some of you are criminals. Firmament-worthy crimes. Jairo didn't do anything, but that parasite's high risk in return for the high reward of an easy-to-teach superhero. Your strength is immeasurable, Chris fundamentally sees the world in a different and more advantageous way that is killer for a single operative. Dr. Way is Dr. Way." There's a punchline coming to this, I could feel it.

I just rubbed my hands together, tensing my fingers at the knuckles in an attempt to pop them, some sort of distraction from the anxiety this was stirring in me.

"May's powers are, in simple terms, batshit insane. Controlling light, even if she's just the projector, is still really bad. You know what counts as light? Anything on the electromagnetic spectrum. You know what's there?" I shook my head to that question.

"Fucking gamma rays, kid. The fire of God. That young woman could give us all cancer before we even knew what could happen. She is supremely dangerous. Having her learn how to be on the side of good early and fucking fast is how you prevent an apocalyptic scenario." Well, there was the punchline.

"So that's what we are. We're actually some kind of risk assessment program instead of the next generation of heroes." Tancred returned my rhetorical question with a weak shrug.

"In a sense, kind of. We recognize you are all high-risk individuals either via your various abilities and knowledge, your emotional and mental state, or some mix of both. Yes, the practical answer is it'd be better for you guys to be on Uncle Sam's side. You get to be his child soldiers in clown colors, but you're being supported from the ground up." I couldn't even concede that he was being honest. I just had no way of knowing. None of this felt right. There had to be some other layer he wasn't divulging.

"You probably overheard me barking it at my bitch of an ex-wife, but I didn't want high-risk kids to babysit. I wanted the Patriot Project guys who were high risk and could use something constructive. Trained adults that could adjust the equilibrium with the SIT." Without any hesitation from me by this point, my head tilted, and the words fell out from me.

"High risk? The government has more people like us?" Clicking his tongue, Tancred shook his head.

"No, numbnuts. High risk as in strong powers. Crazies flunk the psych evals and don't get recruited by the government. They get hired as third-party contractors and get told to go be a problem in another country. To prevent worse things from showing up, to be clear. I'm the one who gets the problem cases like you guys." I could spit with disgust at how looked down upon I felt. More words erupted from me.

"So what, we're just your pack of super-freaks that you pretend are capable of doing anything good?" That was met with a laugh that pissed me off further. It was like a dog's bark, almost, how it came out of him.

"Again, no, moron. You are superheroes. That's the project I'm maintaining. If you end up being superheroes who are wackjob losers barely kept restrained, that ain't my problem, propaganda to cover your asses is easy. It's up to you guys if you wanna be superheroes people actually fucking like. Don't want me and the rest of the world seeing you as a bunch of charity cases? That's your job." The agent clambered off of his stool, kicking it back into its spot with very careful precision. It didn't even clatter."

My job, meanwhile, is to make the moves that guarantee the American people are represented by superheroes the government has a say in the matter of. You fuck up too much, then you'll just be the second failed project after The Wave of Hope and will get replaced by some other motley crew." The biggest hero team in the world was just another failure to these fucking people? It was moments like these that made me wish I could just bring the entire building down. No dodging that shit. But people would get hurt.

Whatever innocents are in the cafeteria. Whoever's not as fucked up as Tancred in admin. Perry. Eliza. The team, too. Even when I had the winning move, this son of a bitch still walked away on top.

"I can see that tension in your neck, boy." The bastard's reading me like a book.

"You want a follow-up from last time because I touched a couple nerves. Sorry to tell you, but I fucking hate sequels. Blame Highlander. Treat this like a learning opportunity. Anyways, I got you a gift." Reaching into his jacket, lower than where he reached for his gun, he brought out a small plastic rectangle, holding it out to me. A phone.

"Been meaning to get this to you but you've made so many goddamn messes I kept forgetting." I picked up the phone without question, if solely because I knew that if it were a bomb I wouldn't be harmed by it.

"Go on. Button on the right side turns it on. I already got it set up. Even have a special wallpaper for you." Hitting the button, the screen came on. It bore the time of approximately 6 PM and the date of June 6th. It was imposed over an image of Tancred, raising both middle fingers towards the viewer. In that case, me. I looked up from the phone only to see him mimicking the exact gesture.

"It only takes one punch for me to turn your lights off forever." I warned. That dog-like barking laugh again as he turned, strolling towards the door.

"Yeah yeah, save it for when you can actually land it, brat." The door slammed behind him. There was so much he said, but I had no way of knowing what was him trying to tell me the truth to get me on his side, or what was just there to purely fuck with me some more. Hated being put in a position like this. Looking down at the phone, I now had a way to track time. I'd need to figure out how it worked. Everyone else was busy and didn't have access to their phones because- May. She's got all the phones.

She could show me. Turning, I made my way towards the lab, trying to follow the steps Sam gave for reaching the phone area she was speaking about. Amidst the clutter, I could see May, arms crossed as she waited over a pile of phones slotted into some white device. Looked plastic. I approached, speaking up.

"Hey," I said, not sure what would be a better greeting. May turned, posture unchanging as she faced me.

"Hey there, nothing better to do?" Wordlessly, I held up my phone.

"Just got this from Tancred." Her face turned into one of jubilance, striding over to me.

"Agent Tank gave you a phone! Hope it's made of ballistic glass." I rolled my eyes as she picked up the phone, looking at it.

"Same cheap model as ours. I'd put it in the back-up thing, but it only has four slots. I also wish Sam told me it took forever to back everything up. Maybe it's the same thing plaguing Jairo's phone," she mused.

"I just wanted to figure out how to set alarms on it and maybe change the picture on it." With a puzzled look, she shot out a reply.

"The picture?" I went through every vowel trying to find the right sentence before bluntly stating "Just turn it on." She pressed the button on the side, and the look on her face expanded to one of both shock and mirth, with even more laughter. Her laugh sounded almost shriek-like.

"He kind of got you, dude." I nodded, rubbing my palm across my face.

"Yeah, he did. Now could you change the picture so I don't see that asshole and his stupid moustache every time I turn my phone on?" Still laughing, she tapped away at the phone.

"Yeah, yeah. Do you like animals?" I shrugged.

"I don't really think of them one way or the other." May nodded.

"I'll go with something simple, then." A few more taps and she turned the phone back to me. A simple array of abstract colors, piling up towards one corner while the opposite corner was a bluish, black void. Better than Tancred.

"Now let's get you figured out on alarms so we can coordinate a bit better for the demo tomorrow, alright?" Definitely better than Tancred. Even if being reminded of the press conference put my stomach in knots.