Chương 52: You Really Are A God

Ch. 52: You Really Are A God

"My, my. You really are a god," Exley said as the second system flooded his mind. Squonk grabbed his bruised face, "Oh no." He opened his stat screen and looked at the two new, vital pieces of information. Mana: 2% Follower(s): (2/50) Exley's face turned into a smile, his smile turned devious, and his body turned back to Squonk. He walked toward him. Squonk closed his eyes, expecting Exley to bring a swift end to his life as the brute towered over him. Exley grabbed Squonk's collar and pulled him up.

While holding a firm grip, he yelled to his two nephews.

"Boys! Who wants to be double-touched?" Paulie and Sampson exchanged glances, smirking. They both walked up to their uncle.

"How does it feel?"

"Exhilarating." Exley had experienced this before. He let the messages Squonk set for his new followers flow through him. You chose me!? You really chose me!? If this was an accident, I understand. But if not? Oh, thank you! I promise I'm going to try my best to be a good god! Now, time to explain how this system works.

"Skip all this," Exley said. Ah… oh, yeah. I'm sorry. I'm boring you. Totally get it. Right to the good stuff!" As Exley mired through the classes Squonk had set, Sampson and Paulie both touched Squonk's head. Follower(s): 3/50 Follower(s): 4/50 Squonk's mind raced, If one of them kills me, they become me. I'll have to be their guide, live with them. Eat their food. These guys look like their idea of a cheat day is like a single walnut or something. And movie night!? Expendables 3 for the sixth time?

I can't be their guide no matter what happens.

"Yes. You're… you're my champions now, which means that you'll have to do whatever I say. Let me go. Please."

"Not at all. We're Ozid followers through and through. You're a living buff."

"These classes have the most insane names," Sampson said. There's 'Murose Marksmen."

"There's Noxious Nuisance," Paulie said.

"And there's 'Capable Coward." Said Exley, "Hmmm. Seems that Murose Markesmen gives you the range abilities. They give you powers to shoot things using tears. Even using them as weapons. If you go up the skill tree. Noxious Nuisance is all area of effects and debuffs. Toxicity. Poison. Venom. We've seen things like this already. Sampson kept sifting through Capable Coward's description and skill tree, "This one is right up your alley, uncle. These are the buffs. Just… really specific buffs."

"Yes. Once in a private meeting with Ozid, he let us in on a secret. The more niche a power is, the more it can be increased. So, say you did something that increased strength. That might only get you 10%. But say… increased strength against fire opponents? That might net you 25%. While some of these feel like specific use cases… they seem to be the most fitting with my body of work. I'll choose Capable Coward.

These powers are mostly about arming yourself with the ability to run away from a fight, but I believe I could put these to good use. Sampson, choose Murose Marksman, and Paulie, choose Noxious Nuisance." They both said, "Sounds good uncle," in near unison.

"To think, I haven't even used my weapon yet. And then there's this," Exley strung the band he wore around his wrist. Probably won't need to."

"Well… either way," Squonk said, "You can't kill me. Or you'll lose your powers." If you spot this tale on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation. Exley turned back to Squonk, "Kill you? Why would we do that?" Squonk breathed a silent sigh of relief.

"I didn' t even know gods could die. No… We're going to keep you around. You'll make a great addition to Ozid's campaign."

"Uh, huh." said Squonk, "What do you mean?"

"There's a whole host of Ozid followers that could use a double touch. So we're going to keep you. We're going to keep you and have all the followers we can get double touched so that Ozid's champions will be a superior breed of ultra-powered champions. Doesn't that sound nice?"

"N-no. That's… not nice. I have my condo in Boyle Heights."

"You'll stay at the Ozid stronghold in WeHo. It's right above a club where everybody wears the cologne I'm wearing. We could get you some of this cologne. Mask the smell."

"Oh… please no." As terrified as Squonk was to become their prisoner, his eyes flitted quickly to the escaping pale gray dot in the distance. Dory had gathered enough strength to almost leave the stadium. It had been a long exchange but their focus shifted away from her. Samspon's marksman eye was the first to notice where Squonk's gaze was. Sampson turned to look. I cant let them turn around. He used his last 5% mana and winked a tear bullet right at Sampson. Sampson stopped from turning around.

"Ahh! He keeps hitting me in the same spot again." Exley sighed and with little effort whacked Squonk along the noggin.

"Just because we can't kill you doesn't mean we can't rough you up." The pain reverberated around Squonk's skull as he grabbed his head. Sampson said to his uncle, "Please tell me you have another health potion. I don't think I'll be able to fight Drake when he shows up." Exley reached into his belt and grabbed the only other vial he had.

"This is my last one. Two health potions in a row is a strain on the body but you're right. You're no good to me." As he turned around to hand Sampson the vial, he looked ahead and remembered Dory. Just as she was escaping.

"Hold on a minu-" Before Exley could finish that statement, Squonk jumped on the brute's shoulders and yelled, "Run, Dorry, run!"

"Get off of me!" Exley grabbed his new patron and tossed him over his shoulders.

"Sampson!" Exley boomed. Sampson's wound was healing slower the second time around. Instead, he decided to use his new powers. He said, "Lugubrious Luger!" A bullet formed in his eye and shot. It traveled across the field and got Dory in the back. She fell forward.

"Don't tell me you killed her, boy."

"Naw, she was way out of my range and the stats say it loses a ton of efficacy after that. Probably hit her like a bb gun." It did hit her like a bb gun but she was a leukemia patient who'd just given blood so this fucking moron could have killed her.

"Well.. those talks with Drake are going to be tense, but anyway. Let's retrieve her."

"I'll go do it," Paulie said.

"No. I think Sampson should. Sampson, you go check on her. Be quick about it""Yes sir."

"Hey!" Paulie yelled, "I've been listening to you all night. I want to go get her." Exley and Sampson exchanged a knowing glance. Exley decided if it was worth the fight. He decided that it wasn't.

"Okay, Paulie. But we need her… relatively unharmed. Just go get her and bring her back. Got it?" Paulie didn't say anything.

"Got it?" Exley repeated. Paulie begrudgingly said, "Fine." Paulie ran across the field. Exley asked his nephew, "He's your brother. You think he'll behave?" Sampson shook his head and said, "He never does." Dory placed her elbows on the ground and tried her very hardest to get up. Spiros had fallen out of her sweater but turned around but bit the string hanging off the hoodie and pulled at it.

"Come on," Spiros murmured through the string, "He's coming quickly!" Dory looked up at Spiros and said, "Hey, man. I'm trying my hardest." With the last of her strength, she pushed herself off the ground. As she rose, she felt a hand on her shoulder. Dory turned around only to be greeted by Paulie's ghoulish smile.

"Don't resist too bad. I don't want to hurt you." She yanked her shoulder away from him and said, "I don't believe you."

"Come on. Don't make this hard."

"You couldn't get hard if you tried, asshole." She punched him in his dick and he doubled over in pain. Dory picked herself up and started running. Still bent over, Paulie said, "I'm going to need some help over here!" Sampson ran to join Paulie. As Sampson ran to meet his brother, he saw a figure running along the sky. He squinted, but could not make out figure was running over head. He chalked it up to some wayward windabeest and kept moving. Paulie finally regained his composure and leapt at Dory.

He grabbed her shoulders. There was nothing she could do. He lifted her up and her legs were kicking helplessly. Sampson stopped moving as he saw his brother recover.

"Paulie! You still need me?" Paulie turned to Sampson, still gripping Dory and yelled, "Naw! I'm good!" Sampson flashed a thumbsup. He was about to turn around and go back to Exley. There was a flash of movement out of the corner of his eye, and before Sampson could turn around, he watched Paulie's head explode.