Chương 24: Book 1; Chapter 23; Creation of the world (2)

He closed his eyes, feeling in the moment, trying to take every possible bit of every second. There were and still are so many people who would give up everything they have, including their own soul, for immortality, imagining that it is the highest gift one can receive. How wrong they are… How completely and utterly wrong they are! One cannot go any further from the truth, calling this incurable curse a gift…

"You know so much truth that it actually became your own prison, where you yourself are both a prisoner and a guard." - Jonathan's wife said.

"You know the truth so well that it is not possible for more truth to enter because of the walls you have built around yourself. Well, let me tell you that truth never opposes another truth. You are the one who taught me and so many others that there is nothing impossible or forbidden or too audacious, as long as one has motivations from the heart that do not restrain others. And now you say that here is something impossible. They both cannot be true, at least not in the same light.

"The One itself told me that before I accepted The Gift. He made sure that I fully understood the consequences of it."

"And The One itself taught you the truth about freedom of will and wish. And The One doesn't make mistakes and never opposes itself. So if both these statements are factual, then the truth you know is incomplete in some ways. All you have to do is open yourself to receive more." What she said was true, and he understood it by himself long ago, but no matter how much he tried, he was not able to connect it.

"I am a part of you, and you are a part of me – it is not possible to separate something that is one whole," she continued.

"Don't be sorry for me – it isn't me who will suffer, as I already understand the truth, and I will never be alone or apart from you. You, on the other hand, are not able to accept it yet, and until you do, you will feel lonely. But please, every time you feel this way, remember what I say now – I am next to you, just as I am now, or even closer. Not in your imagination, not as a memory, but right next to you, as close as one can be."

The silence fell over them for a while, then she added,"If your will wouldn't be so strong, I might be able to reach you in that prison of yours and show a way out, but no matter what one can say, no matter what knowledge is passed to you, it is only something you know until you understand it. Until you feel it, no matter what you know, it will make no difference whatsoever. Your will is like a mountain, and only you can find a way out of it."

The time was passing, and they were both sitting under this tree like nothing else in the world was happening.

"I can stay like this forever," he said.

"Maybe this is a way to stay together?" She laughed into his chest, then said after a while:"No matter how much you love me, you also love life; it is a part of you that makes you the person you are. And you know that only you now are connecting me to this body, no matter if it is broken or healed. To keep me in this body, you would have to lose yourself."

"I don't mind."

"But I do, even if you don't. And you know yourself, it isn't true what you just said." She lifted her face and he kissed her, tightening his embrace.

"Jonathan, there is something I wanted to tell you for a while, but I don't know how to say it so you would understand it, not just hear it. You always beat and battled yourself for being born out of the race of greed." She waited for a bit before adding,"But you are not." He didn't say anything, just smiled with a sad smile while looking in the distance towards the smoking city where clouds slowly started to leave, taking away the rain and storm they brought with them.

"I told you a lot about my family," he finally replied.

"And my parents and parents of my parents and my siblings and their children. I know you love me and want to see the best in me, but I am from the origin of the purest examples of greed. I don't beat myself for that, but a man must understand where he has come from and what his base is. I have been blessed not to be put in situations that would awaken greed in me, but that is not up to choice – once my kind is placed in the"right" surroundings, the greed will grow without a fail when in other nations it doesn't.

When other nations have a choice to subdue to it or not."

"And still you are not your family, and you have been in countless situations but never succumbed to greed. Not by chance but by your will, by your choice. Where others might not have a choice, you do, because you are not of the kind of greed. Or at least you always had an option to choose what kind you want to be."

"Then who am I?" he asked while kissing her head.

"A kind of faith, a kind of hope," she replied. Both were silent for a minute." An easy escape," he thought to himself, " a nice way out of unwanted origin…"

"There is no such a kind as faith," he replied aloud.

"Faith is an attribute that every nation shares. It never became dominant in any nation."

"The same they say about love, but at the same time everyone who remembers old ways knows that there are people of the kind of love who can be born in every nation. Or you will try to object to that, too?"

"How would I object to it, even if I wanted to, when I am holding one right now in my hands?" he replied.

"But still I never heard about anyone from the kind of faith."

"Maybe they are very rare, or maybe they are not recognised because no one was looking for them. Or maybe you are one of the kind. I don't know. But nevertheless, it doesn't change the fact that you are born of faith, of hope. I know that I will not convince you now, nor will I be able to change how you take it. But still I am telling you this as a fact, not as a fantasy – you are born of faith, and it doesn't change if you know it or not, if you believe it or not, that is the fact.

But I do want you to know it, as maybe, just maybe, it would help you to understand yourself a little bit better and help you to release yourself from the prison you have put yourself into." After a short silence, she added,"Maybe it will help you to see that, despite it being a blessing, it also holds you back when unintentionally used wrongly, as now the biggest faith you have is faith in yourself."

"I have faith in you," he said in reply.

"And yes and no," she said. Unauthorized use: this story is on Amazon without permission from the author. Report any sightings.

"If you had faith in me, you would already be opening to what I say, not just hearing it. But your faith is in a trust in yourself, that's why you don't allow yourself to make the slightest mistake or be surprised – you always know all outcomes. Sometimes control them, sometimes let them be, but still all actions are under what you let happen or what you have expected that might happen.

But if you are not allowing even the possibility of a mistake or surprise, you're closing yourself off from learning about something of what existence you are not aware of."

"And who should I have faith in?" he asked.

"I fully trust you, I fully trust my friends, I fully trust myself."

"Maybe god?"

"God? In which god should I trust? All gods that these fools are building statues and churches for fall into either the categories I already mentioned or under the category "lies". You know how many different temples and churches they built for me or other Gifted? Does it make us any different? Does it make us any greater because of that?"

"The One," – she suggested quietly.

"The One?" – he asked in surprise"but I have complete and unmovable faith in The One. I trust him even more than I trust myself and the rest of the world. He is always here, he is always ready to help, he is always telling the truth, he knows everything, and he shares everything. I met him, or rather, got as close to him as any living being in this or the other world can get. I have complete faith in him."

"It sounds like you know everything about him, but when you know everything, you can discover no more. When you know all the ways, you cannot find a new one." Both fell silent for a while.

"Do you think there are still ways that I can discover?" – he asked finally.

"Always," – she replied.

"Would you help me discover them?" – he asked again.

"Always," – she replied again.

"Then you will have to stay with me," – he said, silently smiling while tears rolled down his face.

"Always," – she replied again, gently brushing away these tears with her fingertips and kissing his lips.

"I… cannot see or hear people who crossed over," – he said these words very slowly and very quietly –"I never had this gift nor was I ever able to learn it."

"Then feel me," – she whispered in return –"you can feel me now, you will feel me when I go."

"But would you mind if I simply don't let you go?" – he asked with his eyes closed. –"Despite what you said, I would rather have you in my arms and love you than let you go and love life… Life was meaningless long before I met you, it will become the same meaningless if you go. No, not the same, much, much worse, something I don't even want to think about."

"I would not mind," – she smiled – "but things don't always depend just on us." Neither of them said anything anymore. They just stayed together under that big old tree, she resting on his chest, and he holding her in a tender embrace with his cheek pressed to her head. They stayed like this for a while until a silent, unexpected sound came from the house. A child was crying.

"You have a guest?" – he asked.

"No," – she replied –"it must be Aydeen. I told Justine to hide with him in a hiding room. But there is only a certain amount of time a child can be afraid and silent, he probably got tired of hiding."

"Who is Aydeen?" – he asked again.

"A little beautiful boy," – she replied –"Green eyes, slightly curled hair, brave, calm, and straightforward. He is very, very smart. There is still half a year to go to his second birthday, but he is already talking a bit. He always tries to do his best no matter what – so much that it pains me sometimes just to watch it, I always want to say "Slow down and enjoy" but I know better by now than even to try." King was listening very intensely, and with each word, his heart was beating faster and faster.

"He loves his bigger sister very much, but he probably just got tired of sitting in that tiny room under the ground, as there is not much to do, and he likes doing things. He loves life just as much as his dad does, and he is waiting to meet his dad very badly." The silence fell upon him, and only the beating of his heart could be heard; only his embrace became tighter and tighter.

"I thought it was impossible," He finally said, staring straight in front of him, obviously at something that only he himself could see.

"I always thought that it was impossible for me to have a child."

"You think and overthink many things, but not all you believe is always true,". She replied, smiling.

"I have a son and wasn't here for him for all this time… Wasn't here with you while you were bringing him into the world, while you've been helping him to grow and take his first steps… With all the time given to me, with all the power given to me, I wasn't here…" His eyes narrowed.

"I have a son whose mother was left to defend his family on her own while I was aimlessly travelling… I have a son who has to hide under the ground like a mouse just because his dad didn't manage to make this place safe for him to live and grow." By the irony of fate, as if to confirm his words, the sound of iron and marching feet rose from the dark valley below the hill. Armed people were approaching. For the first time in many years or maybe in his entire life, he felt such hopelessness and dread.

The approaching people were no danger to him, but if he had to take his attention to them, then he would not be able to sustain his wife's life; Even now, it wasn't easy to do after the blow that he had just received. He could hide himself and her with the help of this tree by altering its branches and trunk, and stay unnoticed for as long as needed until they would eventually leave. But then this would leave the children unprotected. Even if they are well hidden, a loud noise would definitely betray them.

And it was clear that these soldiers would not just pass by. He used magic, which these days is called witchcraft; they will search each house, each corner, to find the one to hold responsible for it. The choice was made – he lifted his hand with a clenched fist, but then it was pressed back down by force.

"A life for a life is never a choice, it's not for you to choose who lives and who dies,". She said.

"Promise me right now that you will not break your vows just because one of the living shares the same blood as you – it never was a reason."

"How do you expect me to live on if I failed to protect you at first and then our children?"

"How do you expect me to live if I am the reason for the downfall of the man I love more than I love myself? How do you expect me to live if the gift from god I brought into this world contributes to one of the greatest tragedies that might befall humanity? How do you expect your son to live in this or other world, thinking that it is his fault that the man who didn't break or tremble for anything has fallen for his sake?" His hand collapsed, and horror started to creep over him.

What a useless and hopeless situation… He stood up on his feet, supporting his wife by his side. If he manages to get the children out in time, they can ride the horse away from here. Justine is a good rider, and she will protect the boy until they find them. He looked at his horse and froze to the ground. The poor animal was lying on the grass, still not recovered from the hellish ride they had hardly a few hours ago. There is no way anyone can ride it at any time soon.

Jonathan's body started to tremble from tension.

"I am sorry for putting you in such a situation," – she said softly, embracing him and placing her head on his shoulder –"it pains me to see that I have pushed you to make impossible choices. But understand that despite what you think, he is a lucky boy in a way, because if he is to live, he will have the most wonderful father to look after him, and if he dies, then he will stay with me, and we both will look after you and wait for you. Have faith. No, be faith, as you were born to be.

And have faith in god, have faith that he is and can do so much more than you give him credit for." He looked at her for some time. Then, without a word, he leaned over and kissed her. The clouds have parted by now, and the moon has peeked out. The footsteps of the soldiers were approaching fast, but he didn't care any more about them. His heart returned to its usual calm, his mind returned to its normal clearness. All he could think of was how much he loved this woman who stood next to him in his embrace.

The woman he was planning to spend his life with. But who, despite still being here in his hands, was also already far away, far beyond. He parted from her lips and looked at her face for a while. Faith… why not? He has faith. Always did, and still does. But reality often chooses a different way. Maybe he really tries too hard? Perhaps faith is more than knowing and understanding, trusting and trying… He touched her face with his fingertips one last time, and she kissed his palm in return.

"You will always be in my heart," – he said.

"It cannot be different because we are one, just have faith, and you will find a way to be with me again in full." While looking in her eyes, he lifted his right hand to his chest and, with his thumb, he drew a sign across his heart and pressed his fist to his chest. His chest started to glow with a green light that spread across his entire body in no time. All his body was glowing in a beautiful emerald green that was getting brighter and stronger.

With a sudden movement of his hand, he pushed this light from his heart down into the ground. The light spread around him like a green pool of water and rippled away in all directions at extraordinary speed. Soon, all that one could see up to the horizon was covered in this beautiful green light, and it was spreading further and further. His heart was pumping this light, this energy, like a never-ending fountain.

All around got quiet: the approaching footsteps, the distant shouting of people, the sound of nature in the woods, the wind, and the air itself. All had stopped as time doesn't exist in this place, in this state.